A Fairy Ring
by Un-kissable
Summary: Draco is a bully.Harry is easily intimidated.Draco can't hear.Harry can't talk.So they get to share a room in the handicapped wing at Hogwarts School For The Gifted.But why do they seem to get along so well?Draco usually eats kids like Harry for lunch...
1. The Start Of It All

**_It's a long story..going back as far as I can remember. But if you've got the time, I'd like to finally tell someone my story. My story of happiness, sadness, emptiness, depression, pain, and then, finally, happiness again. And I know what you're thinking. "Another story about someone's past, same old same old." And if that's the case, and you'd rather not read it, well, that's your choice. But for anyone still reading, I hope you enjoy..._**

* * *

"Harry, lunch time!" My mom called. My face lit up. I loved picnics with mommy and daddy. Hell, I loved _anything_ with mommy and daddy.

So I came running from my room, tripping a bit over my own two feet (I wasn't the most balanced toddler) and right into mommy's waiting arms. I had the perfect life. I played all the time, and mommy was teaching me to read and all kinds of neat things. I had it made. And you know what people say about someone who has everything..

They've got to lose it all to appreciate anything.

But I was too young to understand the lesson in this. I remember, I'd only ever spoken once in my life when it all happened. Actually..that was _when _I spoke. But I'm getting ahead of myself. Right now is the time for my picnic with mommy and daddy.

Mommy set me on daddy's shoulders and then carried the picnic blanket while daddy carried the basket. We walked for a long time that day, leaving out backyard and traveling into the forests that lined our land. It was interesting to me, seeing the colors and the shades and everything just smelled so fresh and clean.

I reached up to touch the branches a few times, once getting a shower of water droplets from a recent rainfall down my back. I had jumped and grabbed daddy's face. I remember mommy laughing at me. Mommy's laugh always made everything better. I couldn't help but smile.

I still dream about that laugh. On those rare days when I would wake up happy through my childhood, it was always because mommy had come to see me. And she had taken me on a picnic. Sometimes daddy was there too.

We stopped in a clearing. There was a little pond with rocks lining it's rim. There were white flowers everywhere. I still assume they were lily's. Perhaps because of my mother.

Dad layed out the blanket and we sat down to eat. I was munching happily, staring in awe at the world around me. That was when I spotted the mushroom circle. Some call it a Fairy Ring. Actually, I've heard many names for it, but the one constant is that if you sit in the center of it and make a wish, it will come true. I stood up and ran over to it. I stepped carefully over the mushrooms and sat down to make my wish.

'I want to someday be happy like mommy and daddy are with each other.' I prayed inside my head.

Mommy walked over and picked me up, using sign language to tell me it was almost time to go. That was something some people found strange about mommy and I. We only talked using our hands. I'd never made a sound in my life.

Until she set me down on the blanket. I looked up at her with a smile on my face, the last smile of mine she would ever see. I saw a shadow moving out of the woods, and at first I thought it was daddy. Then I realized that this man coming towards us had no hair. My face turned to one of pure terror and I pointed. Mommy tilted her head.

"**_What is it, baby_**?" She asked, both out loud and in sign. I opened my mouth as the man rose his weapon, an axe, above my mothers head.

"_Mommy look out_!!!" I screamed.

Her eyes widened and she turned to face her attacker as he lowered the fatal blow. Daddy heard me scream and came running through the woods. When he saw the man he went into a blind rage. The fought for a long time, and I tried to help daddy, but the man simply kicked me aside. I landed on the mushrooms in the circle. They were crushed, and I'd hit my head on a rock, causing me to pass out.

Daddy had carried me back to the house, the man who killed mommy laying dead in the pond. He'd also called for 2 ambulences. I didn't know what was going on when I finally woke up inside of the white truck-like vehicle.

I looked around, wondering where daddy was. The EMT hadn't realized I'd woken up, so I found out the harsh truth without anyone even meaning to tell me.

"The kids dad lost a lot of blood. I don't even know how he managed to stay alive long enough to save his kid." One voice said.

"I don't know. But now both of this kids parents are dead." Another voice said.

I suddenly remembered everything.

And wished that I had made a different wish in the Fairy Ring.


	2. Panda

I was in the hospital for two days. Well, the medical hospital anyway. After I got out of there they realized that I wouldn't even sign so they sent me to a psychiatric facility.

I was there for two months. I spent my birthday there. I didn't get any presants. In fact, that was the start of the end of my 'happy' birthdays.

I was silent the whole time I was in there. No shock there, I'd never spoken. Unless you count what happened at the picnic. I don't. Not really. I was considered not mute, but a victim of Post Tramatic Stress. Whatever.

I was sent to live with my mothers sister, Petunia. She was married to a rather large man and they had a balloon for a child. Dudley, they called him. Dudley hated me instantly, because his mom was giving me attenion that he felt belonged to him. He would tattle on me at first for little things that I did wrong without knowing it was wrong to do. Then he would do things himself and blame me for it. Of course when they asked me if I did it I didn't answer, so they assumed I was guilty. Thus punishment ensued. It got to the point where anything that went wrong was blamed on me, no matter who's fault it actually was.

I was eventually not allowed to have desert. Then I had to do dinner dishes. Next they took away TV. Then I wasn't allowed dinner. It kept going that way for a while. By the time it reached its worst I was living in a broom closet under the stairs and only allowed to eat one thing per day. I did all of the chores and got beatings at least once a day. Usually from my uncle. I hated his beatings, because we were usually alone for them, and he usually punished me with more than just a few wacks upside the head. His punishments stole my innocence.

They sent me to a special eductaion school and I was at the top of my class. They reffered me to the public school where Dudley went. Vernon fought it, but in the end I had to go. I was top of my class there too. I had perfect attendance and honor roll. I wasn't allowed to stay home, ever. Even when I had a fever of 103, I had to go to school. Not that I really minded. I studied harder than anyone else. The school started to wonder if I was a genius by the time I reached fourth grade.

My uncle got more angry for that, and started forbidding me from coming home until dark. He said it was my punishment for taking away Dudley's glory. I started spending evenings at the park two blocks away fromt the house. The one Dudley didn't go to. That was where I 'met' him.

I never saw his face. Or any other part of him, except for his handwriting. He saw me, I know he did, because he left the notebook. I found it on the swing one day, but I never knew who left it there. So many kids played at that park I couldn't keep track. It was a bright green notebook.

_My mom told me I could leave this notebook for you, so that we could be pen friends.  
I think you need a pen friend, because you're always swinging alone.  
I'm not allowed to tell you my name though. Mommy said it wasn't a good idea.  
She said you wouldn't write back, but you will, right?  
I'm not sposed to tell you what I look like too.  
But that's not fair, cuz I know what you look like.  
Your eyes are my favorite color. I like green.  
And your hair is black.  
I've never seen you around the neighborhood.  
I think you live somewhere else.  
Mommy says I have to go to bed now, but will you write to me?  
Mommy's gonna read this to make sure I didn't tell you too much.  
Bye-bye._

That was the first thing he ever wrote to me. I don't know how, but I just knew it was a boy talking to me. I wrote back to him that night, and left the notebook in the same place. Looking back on it, it was pretty childish, but it was the only connection to another person that I had.

**I don't think I'm supposed to have friends. My uncle might get mad.  
But maybe if I don't tell him he won't punish me...I won't tell.  
How old are you, anyway? It's ok if you don't tell me...  
I figured you have to be in school, cuz you can write.  
I'm ten. And my name is Harry Potter.  
I live in a different neighborhood.  
My favorite color is red.**

That was all I wrote the first time. It was like interenet dating I suppose, except that I had to write everything by hand, and we were just friends. All I know is that sometimes I only went to the park to see if he wrote back.

_I told mommy you'd write back!  
__Why aren't you allowed to have friends?  
Your uncle sounds mean. How does he punish you?  
Mommy said I can tell you how old I am. Guess what? I'm ten too!  
I don't go to school. My mommy home-schools me. Why?  
Are you the Harry Potter that was in the accident 8 years ago?  
Mommy said that it was a really sad thing that happened.  
Can we play together next time? It would be lots of fun.  
What time is your bed time? I have to be in bed by 8.  
So I have to go again.  
Good night Harry!_

I wrote back the same day and left the note book in the same bush we'd been leaving it in. This time I left a key inside the book.

**He just hurts me sometimes, that's all. He doesn't like me to be better than my cousin.  
I'm the same Harry from the accident. It was really scary.  
The key is the key to my house from when I lived with my mom and dad.  
My uncle was gonna throw it out..can you keep it for a while?  
And aren't you too old to call your mom mommy?  
I can't play with you. I have to play by myself. My aunty would tell my uncle.  
I have to go to my room at 5:30. That's their rule.  
They don't tell me to go to bed. I just do.  
I'm going to give you a nick-name, okay? Cuz that way I have something to call you.  
Good Night!**

I couldn't wait for the next day. I rushed through my chores and ran to the park. The notebook was sitting in the same spot, but the key wasn't there.

_Yeah, I'll hold onto the key for you.  
How does he hurt you? Does he spank you?  
I don't really care how old I am. I love my mommy as my mommy.  
I don't like your family very much. They all seem really mean.  
What are you gonna nickname me?  
Write back so I can find out!  
Good night Harry!_

I pulled out my pen and wrote back to him right away.

**I'm gonna call you Panda, cuz I found whit hair on the page.  
And well..panda bears have white and black hair.  
And I have the black hair..so we're like a panda. Get it?  
My family isn't mean. They took me in when my parents died.  
They're the nicest people, but I'm not their kid..  
So sometimes I get out of line and uncle has to punish me.  
It's okay.  
Good night Panda!**

I made it to sixth grade because of him. We talked to each other that way every night. Then after that he just stopped writing. I went to the park every day for 10 days and never saw the notebook sitting there, so I just figured he'd moved away, or had outgrown going to the park or was annoyed with me or..something. After nothing for a week, I stopped going.

I don't really know how I made it through middle school without him. Eventually the part of me that knew him just let him go into the past. I learned to live without anyone caring about me. But I missed him.

* * *

A/N: Sort of steady progression? I hope? D: Shoot me if it's going too fast. -dodges bullets-


	3. Hogwarts

For some reason I just grew cold to the world after that. Anyone who tried to talk to me or be my friend I just assumed they were teasing me, so I ignored everyone. By the time I made it through middle school there had been a full scholarship offer for me to go to Hogwarts School For The Gifted. It even included dorms. I couldn't believe my luck. I was 14 and I got to leave that horrid place. At least for the school year.

I had to go to the first day living at home, then I would be assigned a roommate and a room. I sat on the front steps waiting for Dudley to get in the car.

'Typical.' I thought to myself as I watched my aunt and uncle drive away.

Dudley needed the excercise like I needed to gain weight. Badly. Actually, as far as I was concerned, Uncle Vernon needed to lose some weight too. They both looked like walking walruses. And they had tempers like a tiger whos tail had been lit on fire.

I watched them until they reached the end of the street and dissapeared around the corner. I hoisted my backpack up onto my right shoulder. I headed out, knowing there would be hell to pay if I was late for school. I had to wear a dark green uniform that fit too tight, and my backpack was almost at the point of tearing. If I knew anything, I knew I would be an easy target for bullies.

The sky was a dark grey, taunting me with the chance that it would rain soon. I shook my head and my black hair messed itself again. I fixed my glasses and started walking. I had a 40 minute walk ahead of me, and I was preparing myself for the worst.

After only 10 minutes the sky uttered a loud roar of thunder, and it began to pour. I sighed and started jogging, not noticing until it was too late that I was running strait into a puddle. I sighed and stopped on a corner to wait for the light to turn so I could cross. As it waould happen, while I was waiting a car drove by, splashing me and spattering me with mud. I just sighed, shaking my head. At least the rain would clean me off before I got to school.

I darted across the street and nearly tripped as I stepped up onto the sidewalk. I looked down and saw that my shoelace was broken. All I could do was wait for something else to go wrong. The school finally came into his vision, and I picked up his pace, breaking into a dead run, realizing I'd gotten there twenty minutes faster than I'd planned. Not that I minded at all. I saw people staring at me as I walked up, but I was used to it. People always stared at me. I was the weird kid. I was the freak. And just as I'd suspected, two tough looking sophmores seemed to have taken a particular interest in me. I kept my head down as I ran under the balcony. One of the sophmores stuck his foot out and tripped me. My backpack flew onto the ground and tore wide open. I wasn't doing much better. The two boys were laughing as if they'd never seen anything funnier in their lives. My face burned red.

"Hey..are you Harry Potter?" A blond boy asked, a serious catch of curiosity in his voice.

He was thin, with a somewhat pointed face. His uniform was green, indicating that he was a freshmen. His hair was brushed back and gelled in place. He was a typical pretty boy.

I nodded, looking at the boy with eyes that would kill. I got up and gathered all my stuff. The blond looked away.

"I just wanted to know if that's who you were.." He said softly.

I pushed my way past everyone else and into the building. I went to the office to look at the list of roommates. I looked for my name and found out my roommate was Draco Malfoy. We were sharing the biggest room in the handicapped wing. I walked down to the dormatory wing and opened my door. If I remembered properly we weren't starting classes for a week. I dumped my few belongings on the bed that wasn't all draped in green. I sighed dramatically as I lay on my bed.

Maybe here I could tap into my bank account and get some better fitting uniforms and a laptop. I needed both quite badly. I fell asleep pretty soon after getting to my room and dreampt of nothing.

* * *

I woke up at around time for orientation. I was caught off guard by the white haired boy from earlier sitting on the other bed. I rolled over and looked at him with furrowed brows.

"Hey." He said. I tilted my head. "I'm Draco."

I nodded. He smiled softly.

"Cat got your tongue?" He asked. I glared at him. He laughed. "Alright, fine. Don't talk to me."

He shook his head in annoyance. I sighed and got up to go to the 'Great Hall.' Also known as the cafeteria. I knew right then that I wouldn't get along with my room mate until he figured out that I don't talk.

I took an empty seat at the back and watched the lights go out except in the front of the room. A man in blue jeans and a blue jacket smiled out at us. His hair was to his waist and his beard was just as long. His eyes twinkled softly as he welcomed us all to the school.


	4. Figuring You Out

Draco was sitting two rows in front of me. I normally wouldn't have cared, but he was throwing things at other students - chewed gum, candy wrappers, pencils, wads of paper - anything really. I picked up a small square peice of plastic and threw it at him. It hit him square in the back of the head. I looked back at Dumbledore with the same bored expression I'd had earlier. I could feel Draco staring at me.

"And thus this years orientation is finished." Dumbledore smiled.

There was a mad rush to get to the doors. Draco started pushing people down. I don't know why he pissed me off so badly, but I wasn't gonna let him sit there and pick on the girls. I shoved him - _hard_. Everyone stared at me as he hit the ground. I glared down at him, and he looked up at me with frightened eyes. I held my hand out to him.

Much to my - and everyone else's - shock, he actually grasped my hand and let me help him up. We walked back to the room in silence. He kept looking at me through the corner of his eye. I kept my face strait forward. I knew he was waiting for me to say something.

I opened the bedroom door and lay down on my bed, barly pausing to kick off my shoes. He sat on his bed and glared at me.

"What the hell was that for?" He asked.

I didn't spare him the effort it would've taken to turn my head and glare. Apparently that pissed him off, because the next thing I knew he was next to my bed, shoving at me. I simply ignored him.

"Answer me you fucking faggot." He said.

I finally rolled to look at him. He looked at me expectantly. I pushed him away from my bed. He let out an irritated sigh.

"Why won't you talk?" He glared at me.

I sat up and looked him right in the eye before moving to get a sheet of paper. I looked at him, then wrote quickly, but neatly.

_I'm mute, dipshit._

That made him stop. He stared at me a moment, an almost perfectly hidden apologic look in his eyes. He shook in head in disgust.

"You're a freak." He said.

I smiled at him and signed. **_So are you._**

"Shut up! I'm no such thing!" He yelled, shoving me.

Then he seemed to realize what he'd done. I leaned back on my bed comfortably.

**_What, no one knows you're going deaf?_**

"Shut up." He grunted.

**_Aw, you upset that I figured out your secret?_**

"Shut the hell up! If you tell anyone I swear to god I'll-"

**_What? Bully me for having a disability when you're worse off than me? Try it. There's nothing you could do that would phase me._**

"Just..just stop it!" Draco yelled. He sat on his bed irritably and bit his lip. "Don't tell anyone."

His voice caught me slightly off guard. I turned to look at him and saw that I hadn't heard him wrong. He looked wounded, like he'd taken a major blow to his ego.

**_Then lay off of everyone._**

"I can't just stop. That would raise a lot more questions." Draco said.

**_It's not my fault that you're trying to make up for your insecurities by making everyone else feel like dirt._**

"Shut. Up." He growled.

I shrugged and rolled over. I was done talking to him anyway.

* * *

His bullying didn't stop, but it was lightened considerably. And of course he left me alone. Sometimes I felt like he was waiting for something when I got to our room at night. He would just sit there and look at me, usually when he hadn't bullied anyone that day. I would just nod, and go to bed, but that needy look in his eyes would haunt my dreams.

One friday, two months after the orientation, I came back to the room and found him curled up in his bed, crying. I just stared at him for a few moments before I realized he didn't know I was there. I flicked the lights off and on quickly. His eyes snapped open and he stared at me, wiping his eyes quickly.

"Allergies.." He muttered, rolling over.

I didn't bat an eyelash at his lie and I just went to bed. He'd done nothing to earn my caring about him. As far as I was concerned he was just a roommate with too many secrets.

Like that he was gay. No one would have ever picked up on it, but I knew. He acted strait perfectly, but I saw through it. He was in the closet, and he was a long way from coming out to anyone. It bothered me a bit that I knew this. I'm not sure why. I guess I just felt like I had too much over him for him not to have a damn thing over me, but I kept him in line for the most part with his secrets.

The gay one came in handy pretty well one day at lunch when he'd decided to pick on Hermione Granger, another student at the school on scholarship. All I did was sign the word 'gay' to him, and he stopped dead in his tracks. He hadn't bullied anyone since. Admittedly only a week had passed, but still.

I supposed I should tell him he was doing a good job or something to that effect. I sat up and touched his shoulder. He turned to look at me with his red eyes.

**_You're doing good._** Was all I said before opening the window to let the moonlight in.

I flicked the light off and went back to bed. Another thing I'd learned about Draco that he'd never admit to. He was afraid of the dark. I kept that in mind after the first night that I woke up to him turning the light on and pretending to look for something.

"Thank you.." He whispered softly.

I didn't answer, but somehow I knew that the need he'd been feeling had probably been taken care of, for now at least.


	5. You're Not My Panda

Weeks steadily passed wih no bullying from Draco, and more toward him. There was a rumor saying that the two of us were dating, and that he was whipped. I found that particularly amusing. I was turning over everything that had happened in my head when the door opened. I never paid Draco any mind when he came in, but this time he was demanding my attention. He sat on my bed and looked at me.

**_What? _**I asked, looking at him.

"You're a fucking freak." He said with unusual empty coldness to his voice.

**_And you're a baby that's scared of the dark, stuck in the closet, and going deaf. _**I said. He glared at me.

"You've got balls Potter." He said.

**_What's your problem? You were behaving _so_ well earlier. _**I rolled my eyes. He swallowed.

"I'm not the one with a problem. You're the one that refuses to talk." He glared at me.

**_Because I'm incapable of speach, dipshit. _**I flipped him off. He took a deep breath.

"You could talk if you wanted to." He said. I raised a brow at him.

**_Why did you suddenly decide to bully _me_? _**I asked. He looked away.

"You know damn well why." Draco said. I grinned.

**_Aw, what? You got a crush on me? _**He turned bright red and looked away.

My jaw dropped slightly. He _did _have a crush on me. He got up and went over to his bed. He reached under his mattress and pulled out a little green notebook. I stared at him. He opened it and a key fell onto the floor. I bent and picked it up. It was my mothers key. My eyes widened.

**_Panda._** I signed. He nodded. **_Why?_**

"Why what?" He asked.

**_Why did you have to be him?! He was nice. You're an ass hole! _**I shook my head in disgust.

"I'm sorry.." He whispered. "I thought..you'd be happy to know.."

**_You're a dick! You're not my panda! _**I whipped my pillow at him and it hit him in the face. I froze entirely, waiting for him to hit back.

"You're right..I'm not.." He said, tossing my pillow back on my bed and climbing under the covers.

Two weeks passed before I would so much as look at him again. But he was always staring at me. He ended up going home one weekend to see his mom. She was sick or something. It wasn't until after he left that I found the journal on my bed. I sighed and layed back on the bed, opening it and reading through our old conversatons. Then I found one that was written in a much neater handwriting and dated to the day it was. I sighed and started reading..

* * *

_I'm sorry for not updating sooner. And I'm sorry it's so short. D: There's been a lot going on. 2 of my friends died and one is in the hospital so I've been planning fund raisers and going to funerals all this past week and a half. Anyway..I'm already working on the next chapter! xoxo_


	6. I love you, Mom

**_Then I found one that was written in a much neater handwriting and dated to the day it was. I sighed and started reading.._**

* * *

_Harry,  
I know I'm not what you expected.  
I know I'm a jackass.  
I know you won't believe me if I say I'm sorry.  
But I am.  
I can't tell you how many nights I've reread this book.  
Hoping that maybe I'd meet you.  
And you'd be everything I expected.  
But I was wrong.  
You're better.  
More handsome. More charming.  
More intelligent. More considerate.  
Harry I like you..a lot.  
I want a chance to prove it to you.  
I know I don't deserve it..  
But please..  
Let me try?  
I want you to be my boyfriend.  
Tell me when I get back, okay?  
I'll see you on sunday._

_-Draco_

I stared blankly at the page for a long time. What made him think I'd waste my time on him? Then I sighed..because I knew I would cave and do it anyway. I'd be too scared not too. Hell..he hadn't been afraid of attacking other people..why wouldn't he attack me? I mean especially if I denied him. Uncle Vernon certainly made me do whatever he wanted anyway.

I shook my head. That wasn't the only reason though. I wanted my panda back..and I thought maybe if I dated him..maybe he would come back. I flipped to an empty page and wrote carefully.

**Will you force me to..if I say no?**

**-Harry**

I laid it on his bed and went on with my weekend. Draco came back some time while I was gone. I walked into the room and heard the shower going from our bathroom. I sat on the bed and picked up the notebook that had been resting on the pillow. I flipped it open to the page where his handwriting graced the page.

_Why would I force you?  
How could I?  
You're not something that I own.  
It's your choice Harry._

_-Draco_

I stared at the page for a few minutes. I heard the shower shut off and I looked up at the door to the bathroom. It was still closed. I grabbed a pen and wrote quickly.

**Then..I'll try.  
I don't know how it works.  
But I want proof that you care.  
So..you have to come out.  
To the school. To your parents.  
To everyone.**

**-Harry**

I tossed the notebook on his bed and went to dinner about 15 minutes early.

* * *

**_Draco's POV_**

I got out of the shower and got dressed. I walked over to my bed where the notebook lay. I sat down and opened it up to the page where Harry had written. I leaned back and shook my head. I'd already come out to my parents. Well..My mom and my uncle. Not my dad. I contemplated it, and then finally sighed. I picked up my cell and texted my mom. I continuously pretended she was sick so I could go home on the weekends without anyone asking questions.

_I think I need to tell dad._

She answered almost immediately.

_**Tell him what sweetheart?**_

I bit my lip and texted back slowly.

_The truth..about me._

Her next reply took a little longer.

_Oh..are you sure that's wise?_

I nodded, then realized she couldn't see me.

_It's time he knows.._

She finally asked the question on her mind.

_Does this have anything to do with Harry?_

Ever since I told her I was going to school with Harry she'd been waiting. I told her the truth.

_It has everything to do with him._

I wasn't sure how she'd handle that..

_Alright then..do you want me to tell your father?_

I texted back as quickly as possible.

_No..I'll tell him when he comes up tonight._

I sighed heavily as I waited.

_Alright..I hope it goes well, Dragon._

That was mom code for "Watch out, he might freak."

_Me too. I love you, mom._

I knew her reply before I got it.

_I love you too._

Now I just had to go to dinner and tell the rest of the school. They all knew it anyway..but that didn't make me any less nervous.

* * *

**_Sorry for the sudden POV change. I just seemed fitting to show Draco's side. That..and I wanted to show what a momma's boy he is. xD_**


	7. I'm Gay

**Still Draco's POV**

"Draco." My dad said, greeting me with a small smile. I was suspicious instantly.

"Dad..I want to talk to you." I said. My voice shook.

"About?" His eyes were amused. Like he knew something. I almost backed out. Almost.

"I'm..I'm gay." I said. I waited for the reprocusions, but he just laughed.

"Really now? And you thought you had to confess that to me?" Dad asked. I nodded, wide eyed.

"Yessir." I said softly.

"Funny. You act as though I didn't already know." Dad said.

"You..you knew?!" I stared up at him.

"Of course." Dad wrapped his arm around my shoulder.

"You're not mad?" I asked, disbelieving.

"Why would I be?" Dad asked.

"Well mom said.." I stumbled to make my thoughts coherant.

"She read into my mood a little too far. Don't worry about that. So who's the guy?" He asked as we made our way down to the cafeteria.

"His name's Harry." I said. He went silent a moment.

"Potter." He finally said.

"Yeah.." I said.

"Son..he might be more than you can handle.." My dad said seriously.

"What do you mean by that?" I asked, catching a glimpse of Harry at the Freshmen table.

"He's just got a lot of skeletons in his closet. If you're up for it, then go to him. Just don't expect it to be a normal relationship." My dad said, letting go of me and going to sit with the teachers as one of them laughed out his name.

I paused - terrified only for a moment - and then made my way over to Harry. The brunette looked up at me expectantly. I stared at him for a short while, noticing that the cafeteria was growing silent around us as we kept our eyes locked. Finally I leaned down and kissed Harry's cheek.

"I'm gay." I said, just loud enough for the whole room to hear.

Harry smiled softly and moved over a bit so I could sit next to him. I ate slowly, buterfly's exploding in my stomach. I watched Harry pick at his food and saw him take maybe five bites. I stared at the table as my dad's words began to sink in.

**You told your parents then?** Harry asked in sign.

"They already knew." I muttered. It didn't take long before we decided to go back to our room.

"Will you talk to me now?" I asked, hopeful. Harry tilted his head.

**I can't. **He insisted.

"Why not?" I asked, my voice a persuasive whisper.

**Because I can't.** He looked away.

"Harry..are you alright?" I asked.

**If I talk..they'll find out..and they'll hurt me. **He shook his head. **It's just not worth it.**

"I won't let them hurt you.." I said.

**That's beyond your controll. **Harry glared almost gently at me. **I'm going to bed..good night.**

"Wait..there's one more thing." I said, nervous again.

**What is it? **Harry asked. I hesitated. He raid a brow.

"Well..why don't you eat?" I finally asked.

Harry's hands dropped to his sides and he curled up on his bed. He was unresponsive the rest of the night.

* * *

Harry was fairly quiet the next day too, figuratively. It was a Saturday and he barely took notice of the fact that he had to go to the bathroom. I was nervous as I watched him. I didn't know what to expect. I don't think he did either.

We were watching TV in our room when I saw the sadness in his eyes. We were watching a romantic comedy, and I wondered if he was upset because we weren't like the people on the screen. We weren't even sitting together.

I got up slowly and walked toward him. He turned to look at me and I just smiled. He looked down at his lap and I sat behind him. I trailed my fingers lightly along his back and he tensed up, then relaxed. He looked back at me. I smiled again. He bit his lip and leaned back against me, slightly tense like he was expecting me to get mad. I wrapped my arms around him and played with his hair. He relaxed enough to smile at me.

I stroked his face gently with my thumb, and he looked into my eyes, his own green orbs burning with curiosity. I kissed his forhead and he blushed and rolled onto his side, his head still in my lap. I just continued to trail my fingers gently along his face, scalp, neck, and back. Before very long he was fast asleep.

I pulled him up a bit farther, so he was cradled against my chest, and soon I, too, dropped off into the world of sleep.

My dreams showed me weird things. Bringing images to thoughts I'd rather not have. Harry being hurt by his 'family.' My father's unusual reaction to my confession. My mother's warning text message. I must have been moving around in my sleep, because when I awoke I saw Harry's eyes, wide and nervous, staring into mine. The only thing my mind comprehended was that he needed me. And I had to be there for him.

* * *

**_I'm liking Draco's POV right now. It'll change back soon. _**


	8. Emotions

**Harry's POV**

I didn't realize I'd fallen asleep until I was woken up by Draco squirming beneath me, obviously stuck in a bad dream. I wasn't sure if I should wake him up or not..I'd been having a nightmare of my own. He mumbled out my name and my descision was made. I shook him gently and his eyes opened. He looked right into mine and suddenly I was afraid of what he might see. My eyes were unguarded in a way they could only be right after I woke up. He reached a hand up and placed it against the side of my face. I hesitantly leaned into the touch.

"Did I wake you?" He asked. I nodded. His face turned guilty. "I'm sorry."

I shook my head and yawned. He smiled and moved a bit, so I was sitting between his legs as he sat up. I looked up at him, wishing I could hide behind my eye lashes. He smiled again.

"You don't seem upset that I woke you. Did you have a bad dream?" He asked me. I nodded. He wrapped his arms around me. "I won't let anything hurt you Harry. I'll protect you."

My inability to care was failing me. I sighed and chalked it up to being tired. I closed my eyes and curled up against Draco's chest. The first thing I discovered was that I couldn't sleep.

"Come on, Harry. Let's go get something to eat, alright?" He said. I bit the inside of my lip and nodded. I knew he'd be watching this time.

We went down to the Cafeteria. I started acting cold again. With it the barier brought releif. My eyes were hard, my face emotionless. I wasn't anxious. I grabbed a pouch of pop-tarts and opened it, picking at it bit by bit until I at the whole thing. People were staring at us. I stared back. They usually looked away when they realized I knew what they were doing.

Draco was watching me carefully, confused by my sudden personality shift. I almost smiled at him, trying to be reassuring, but it came out as a grimace, and left him looking more confused than he'd originally been. I knew better than to show publicly that I cared for him. He would be taken away from me. It would be considered a weakness.

I threw out my trash and headed back to our room without him. I felt a little bad, but I knew it would pass. He'd come back here looking for me soon enough anyway. I glanced over at his bed and saw the notebook was lying on it. I picked it up and flipped through it. I found multiple entries I hadn't seen before. Ones in Draco's 12 year old penmanship.

**_I don't think I'll be able to give you this again.  
I'm packing for a cruise..mom surprised me with it.  
I'll be gone for 3 weeks.  
I won't be able to write to you.  
I really, truely, hope you'll still be going to the park when I get back._**

**_-Draco_**

And suddenly I had my explaination for why he'd left me.

**_I waited at the park for you, but I didn't see you.  
I guess I'll just take the notebook with me and write to you on the boat.  
I'm worried that you won't read this though..  
I just have a feeling._**

**_-Draco_**

He had good instincts..

**_The cruise is fun.  
I wish I could just call you and tell you about it.  
That would have made things so much easier.  
I wish I would have thought of that.  
Oh well..I'll talk to you face to face someday.  
And then I'll know what your voice sounds like.  
Cuz you never even laugh at the park.  
I wonder why that is..  
Most kids have fun at the park.._****_  
Well..I'll talk to you when I get back..bye._**

**_-Draco_**

I heard the door open and I didn't look up. I was staring at the pages. He touched my back gently. I closed the notebook and set it down. I turned to him.

**_You never abandoned me..._** I signed in disbelief.

I'd spent so much time believing I'd done something wrong and _made_ him stop writing..when all along it was just bad timing. I felt something strange in my eyes and confusion washed over me. It took me a moment to realize it was tears. It had been so long since I last cried that I didn't know what to do. He wrapped his arms around me, him being only two or three inches taller than me, and pressed his face into my hair.

"I didn't. I wrote to you so many times and I went to wait for you every day. My mom said I was obsessed. She stopped letting me go." He said.

I sighed against his chest and sniffled. That brought on it's own unusual reaction. I sneezed. Apparently I'd made an amusing face because Draco laughed softly. He put on a movie and we laid on my bed to watch it. About ten minutes into the movie my emotions got the better of me and I let myself cry silently. Draco noticed, somehow, and held me until I'd calmed down.

"Harry.." He said. "You..you really do need to tell me what's wrong."

I bit my lip and looked away. How could I tell him everything that upset me at a single time? It was like my braind could only comprehend one good thing at a time, but when the bad came I felt it all, thought of it all, hurt from it all, all at the same time..How could I show him how bad it hurt? I could only think of one way...

* * *

**_TBC..._**


	9. Rawr

_"Harry.." He said. "You..you really do need to tell me what's wrong."_

_I bit my lip and looked away. How could I tell him everything that upset me at a single time? It was like my braind could only comprehend one good thing at a time, but when the bad came I felt it all, thought of it all, hurt from it all, all at the same time..How could I show him how bad it hurt? I could only think of one way..._

* * *

I didn't look up to meet his eyes as I pulled off my sweatshirt. I was wearing a long-sleeved shirt underneath that and I hesitated before pulling that off too. I laced the fingers of my left hand with his right and waited.

I felt his fingers trailing along the raised and, in some places, still healing skin along the insides of my wrists, the backs of my forarms. It was the only way I knew of to make it better. So why did I suddenly feel ashamed?

"Harry..what's happened to you?" Draco finally asked. I didn't look up. I didn't know how to tell him what I felt. I didn't know how to trust that he wouldn't hurt me.

**_It's...my fault my parents are dead. _**I finally signed. **_And if I was a good kid I wouldn't get in trouble all the time..I'm not allowed to eat at home..and my uncles punishments..I have nightmares about them..he says that's how you punish someone..who's done as much bad stuff as I have..because I did better in school than Dudley..and I messed everything up when I came to live with them._**

Draco grabbed my hands. He looked into my eyes with more meaning than I'd ever seen.

"Harry. Listen to me. I know it's not going to change the way you see yourself, but I mean this. It is NOT your fault that your mother and father died." Draco said. "And as far as your behavior, you don't seem to have done a damn thing wrong."

**_If I don't get my chores done then I have to be punished.._**I signed quickly.

"Harry..how do they punish you?" He asked. I let my hands fall. I couldn't bring myself to say it. "Harry..do they hit you..?"

That wasn't something I wanted to talk about. I just shut down. Draco sighed and pulled me close to him. I didn't react.

"Listen..you don't have to tell me today, alright? I'm just..trying to figure out why you're so afraid.." Draco said. I didn't respond. I just laid there in his arms where he'd put me. "Listen..my dad's coming. He wants to officially meet you.."

As if on que there was a knock on our door. I pulled my sweatshirt on over my bare chest. Draco opened the door. A tall man stood in the doorway, looking shockingly like Draco. Blonde hair slicked back, a knowing smiled on his face, and grey eyes.

"Hey, dad." Draco said.

"Hello." His father replied.

"This is Harry. Harry, this is my father, Lucious." Draco said. Lucious Malfoy. Hm.

I nodded slowly, unsure of what to do.

"So Harry, will you be joining us for Christmas?" Lucious asked. Christmas break was in less than two weeks, and it was a two week vacation. I just stared at him, my face blank.

"Dad..Harry doesn't talk." Draco finally said.

"I know. I also know that he can speak using sign language." Lucious said.

**_My uncle wouldn't allow me to.._** I said, keeping my eyes down.

"Harry look at me." Lucious said. I looked up nervously. He had a smile on his face. "I will _personally_ take care of your uncle if you would like to come."

I stared at him for a few moments. He must have thought I was stupid. I finally nodded. He smiled.

"Then I'll see you in eleven days then." He said, getting up. He hugged Draco and then left swiftly.

"You're really gonna come?" Draco asked, unsure. I nodded to him. He grinned widely.

* * *

There was a shopping trip into town the following weekend. I found that I was able to tap into my bank account while at the school. I took advantage of this and bought myself new uniforms that fit and a laptop. My parents had left me a lot. I took some money out to get Draco something, though he probably wasn't expecting it. I spent most of the day wandering. He couldn't figure out why I wouldn't stay with him, but I think he was watching for something I'd be interested in. There was only one thing that caught my eye. It was a blue and green yin-yan pendant on a lether string. I eyes it longingly but knew that if I bought it I wouldn't have enough to get Draco anything. I walked away from it. Draco followed me.

He wrapped his arms around me suddenly and kissed my forhead. I blushed at him and he smiled.

"I'm gonna go back in there. I saw something my mom might like. I'll catch up to you later, okay?" Draco said. I smiled and nodded. I was greatful.

I wandered around the stores alone and finally found something I knew (okay, I _hoped_) he would like. It was a small jade green dragon pendant. It was in the shape of a circle. I bought it and had it wrapped and his name put on it. I only had $5 left afterwards. I pocketed it. As I was walking around with the package perfectly conceiled within my uniforms, Draco snuck up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist.

"Did you have fun today?" He asked. I nodded and leaned my head back against his shoulder. "I'm glad. We have to go back to our Dorms and get ready for bed though. We have classes until Tuesday you know."

I did know. Then we would have to wait until Thursday to go home with his parents. I didn't know _how_ he did it, but somehow Draco's father kept his word and I was to spend Christmas vacation, and any other vacation I wanted, with Draco and his family. I just ad to come home for two weeks over the summer, and for four days of April and Christmas vacation. I was going to spend one night with Draco and then go home for four days, then they would bring me back and I would go to their vacation home in Scottland. I trembled slightly at the thought of going home. Draco mistook it for a chill and wrapped his sweatshirt around my shoulders.

"Come on. We'll miss the bus if we don't hurry." He said, walking beside me with one arm wrapped around my waist and hold my hand with the other.

When we got back to our room I took out the laptop and pulled up the prgram that had caught my eye. It was designed to say, out loud, the words you typed. I clicked on the male English voice and hesitated with my hands over the keys. I wasn't sure what to type. I finally got some inspiration, looking at Draco.

"I bet my rawr is better than yours, Panda." It spoke the words aloud and Draco spun to face me. I grinned and typed in "Rawr."

"You can make your laptop talk _for_ you?" He asked. I nodded.

He walked over to me and stroked the side of my face gently. He leaned in and kissed my lips for the first time. I blushed as he pulled away, looking up at him through my long lashes.

"I still want to hear your voice." He said, smirking. I was biting my lip, savoring the unusual feeling in my stomach and chest. It took a few minutes to place the feeling. I was happy.


	10. Dinner

"Come on, Harry. We have to go meet my parents." Draco said to me. I nodded and he took my hand.

We walked out into the crowded hall and noticed that most people were giving us a fairly wide berth. It was the 19th of December. I was going to be going with my family the day after and then returning on Christmas Eve. I was honestly afraid. My uncle wasn't someone I enjoyed spending large amounts of time with. Actually, I didn't like spending small amounts of time with him either. He was an angry, violent, perverse old man with a purple face, no neck, and a large mustache. I could feel Draco watching me. I looked up at him and tried to smile. He smiled back, his eyes full of pity. He knew I didn't like showing everyone that I was with him.

He pulled his hand out of mine and wrapped his arm around my shoulder. This was more comfortable for me and he knew it. His parents were waiting at the entrance, his mom with a huge grin. She was signing before we'd even reached them.

**_..got a _huge _surprise for you! You're going to be so excited! _**She was saying when we walked up.

Lucius tilted her head toward him and signed quickly to her. **_Let the poor boy breath a moment, love. He's just barely within range to know what you're saying. And Harry hasn't a clue as to who you are._**

She turned to look at me and I squeezed a little closer to Draco. He smiled and leaned his head in closer to mine.

"It's just my mom. Don't be shy. She won't be." Draco said. I looked at him questioningly.

His mother took my hands in hers quite suddenly and I flinched out of habit. Her eyebrows raised in worry. I tried to smile. Apparently I needed to practice, because she looked at Draco. He just smiled encouragingly. She took her hands away from mine and started signing.

**_I'm Draco's mother, Narcissa. _**She said with a warm smile. I nodded. **_Come on, then. We've got lots planned for before you go home tomorrow night._**

I looked at my shoes. I didn't _want_ to go home. I knew what I would be like afterwards. Draco looked at me out of the corner of his eye. I knew he was wondering what I was thinking..but I wouldn't tell him even if he'd begged.

"You two will be riding in the white limo. Your mother and I want to mingle here a bit longer. The driver will bring you somewhere to eat, and when you're done there I'd like you to call me so we can leave and catch up with you. As your mother said, we have a surprise." He winked and walked away with Narcissa.

Draco wrapped an arm around my waist and pulled me close. I looked up at him shyly.

"Come on. This'll be fun." He promised. And with that we made our way out to the white limo in front of the school.

People were staring at us as we climbed in together and I slowed down a bit, suddenly conscious that no one else spent holidays with their boyfriend. Draco noticed my hesitation and helped me into the back. He slammed the door and looked up at the driver.

"Dad said you know where to go?" Draco said. The driver smiled.

"Indeed I do. Would you like me to close the window? I'm afraid it'll be a touch long of a drive." He said.

"Yes, please. Thank you." Draco said as the driver closed the tinted window between himself and the two of us. "A touch long is code for at least an hour."

I nodded and scooted closer to him. He smiled and opened his arms. The seat was wide enough to be a couch..or a bed. I pushed him back so he was laying down on the seat and the rested myself on top of him. I wasn't worried about squishing him. He was a solid muscular 140 lbs. I was barely 90 lbs. I had been eating less since we'd reached the two week mark of going home, and sometimes even vomiting what I did eat. He looked at me like he was horrified. I tilted my head.

"Harry.." He sat up slowly. "I can feel your ribs."

I looked away, shrugging. He moved me around so I was being cradled.

"What happened? I've seen you eating!" He said. "What's going on?"

**_They'll get mad if they can see that I've been eating. _**I signed, not meeting his eyes.

"Harry.." His voice sounded broken. "You can't go hungry."

**_Why not? I'm used to it. _**I said. He hugged me closer, but always delicately.

"Please..promise me you'll eat tonight." Draco said. His face was full of emotions. I just nodded. One day of eating wouldn't do very much.

He held me close to him as he lay back down. I rested my head on his chest and felt him kiss the top of my head. I knew I was the girl in the relationship. I didn't care. He was rubbing my back softly and I felt myself falling asleep.

The next thing I remember Draco woke me up and told me we were at the restaurant. I nodded tiredly and sat up. He held out his hand and I took it. We walked into the restaurant and were seated. I was blinking tiredly as I looked over the menu. It actually looked good. I only had $5 with me though, and so far I couldn't even afford water. I looked up at Draco. He was tilting his head at me.

"What are you getting?" Draco asked. I shook my head. Draco's eyes narrowed. "You promised."

I raised my hands and started signing. **_I don't have enough money on me to get anything._**

Draco raised a brow, then, abruptly, burst out into laughter. He shook his head.

"Harry, I'm paying, love." Draco said. I blushed in embarrassment. "So what looks good?"

I pointed to a picture of Shrimp Fetuchini Alfredo. He smiled.

"You've got to be kidding me. That's all?" He said. I nodded. He smiled softly. "I'll get you to eat dessert too."

I just lowered my eyes to the table. He ordered for me.

I worked my way through to whole dish, pushing the food around my plate but letting my hunger get the better of me and eating it all very slowly. Draco's grin was huge, and, just as he'd promised, he got me a desert which he promptly had me eat. I felt extremely nauseous by the time it was time to go. I leaned against Draco on the way out to the Limo. He smiled and kissed my cheek. I blushed and looked up at him. He was smiling down at me as though there was no where else he'd rather be. I pushed myself up on my tiptoes and kissed his lips softly. He gasped slightly and kissed me back. He pulled me toward the car.

"Come on, my parents have a surprise for us, remember?" He said, pulling his phone out and dragging me to the car.


	11. Draco

I yawned dramatically as I climbed into the car. It was only 6 at night. Draco was on the phone with his dad and from what I gathered we were gonna be in the car another 2 hours before we met up with them. I also noticed that Draco had to continuosly ask his dad to repeat himself. His hearing was getting worse. I instantly felt guilty, as though it were somehow my fault. I always felt like everything was my fault. When he hung up he looked frustrated. He looked at me and sighed.

"My dad's calling the Dr..he's worried." Draco said. I watched him unnblinkingly. Suddenly my exhaustion was gone. I wanted to help him. "He says..I need to have surgery."

My eyes widened and my hands flew upwards. **_Why? What's going on?_**

"They found a new way to potentially prevent and reverse hearing loss." Draco said. I waited. "It means they're giving me donor ear drums..because it's my ear drums that don't work. Not the receptors."

I nodded. **_When?_**

"Well..Harry are you sure you want to know?" He asked. I nodded. "It's..the day after you go home."

I bit my lip. **_How long will it take to know if it works?_**

"Just 16 hours." He said. I was trembling.

**_You'll be ok, right? _**I asked. He smiled.

"Don't worry about that, love." He said. "The only thing that could go wrong is that I lose my hearing. And I'm losing it anyway, so it won't be such a big deal."

I opened my mouth, trying to figure out how words were formed. Draco tilted his head and watched as I struggled. There was something I wanted to say. Having known him as long as I had and getting to know him better over the last few months, I figured it was either justified, or I was crazy. But I didn't know how to speak.

"Harry..are you trying to talk?" Draco asked, realization dawning on his face.

I huffed a bit. It wasn't working. Why couldn't I make a sound?

"Harry, you have to use your throat." Draco said.

I stared at him. My throat? I tried again and produced a squeak. It surprised us both. I fell off the seat, and he laughed. He moved down onto the floor with me and hovered over me a bit.

"Try again..please." He asked. I nodded, lost in his eyes.

I tried again. This time the sound wasn't so high pitched, but it still didn't sound like anything. He showed me how to move my tongue and my mouth to form a word. I watched him for a few moments, trying to teach me to say my own name. I thought back on how everyone's mouths had moved saying his and moved mine like that. He thought I was copying him.

I put my finger on his lips so he would stop and I made the same noise only a little more even and much lower while forming my mouth around the sounds. I knew he couldn't hear me. Finally I looked up at him and grinned.

"Draco." I said. His whole face lit up.

"Oh my god.." He said. He pulled me close against him and kissed me forcefully. I kissed back and then pulled away, pressing my forhead against his and focusing hard on what I wanted to say. He was watching me as I tried to say it.

"I yuvoo." I managed. He looked at me for a second.

"What did you just say?" He asked, somewhat breathless. I was getting frustrated.

"I..yuv..oo." I forced out. He stared at me. I felt a blush slowly crawling up my cheeks.

"I love you?" He guessed, a disbelieving look.

I nodded, looking away. He turned my face back to his and kissed me gently. Once..twice..three times..I stopped counting as he continued kissing me. As I kissed him back. Eventually he stopped. I looked up at him.

"I love you too, Harry. I have for a very long time." He said.

I moved closer to him and kissed him again.

* * *

The limo stopped in a parking lot. Draco smiled at me and told me that we had to wait for his parents. My food had had a chance to digest a bit so I was less uncomfortable as we waited.


	12. Ferris Wheel

When his parents showed up we got out of the limo and walked over to their car. His mother got out and hugged him tightly. I just watched from the side. She smiled at me and pulled me into the hug too. My whole body tensed immediately and my eyes widened dramatically. I know they noticed because Narcissa raised a brow at Draco, who gently rubbed my back and pulled me closer against him. Narcissa smiled, but I couldn't shake the nagging suspicion that I'd hurt her feelings.

"Come on. Your surprise is on the other side of the parking lot." Lucius said.

Draco took wrapped an arm around my shoulder and I stayed pressed close to him as we walked the length of the parking lot. Draco suddenly gasped and let me go, hugging his father.

"Are you serious?" He asked.

Lucius nodded. I got up on my tiptoes to see what was going on, and all I could see was a big metal circle spinning slowly on it's frame. Narcissa was watching my confused face with confusion in her own. She moved in front of me and raised her hands.

**_Do you know what this is? _**She asked. I shook my head. **_It's a carnival._**

**_A..carnival? _**I tilted my head.

**_You've never been to a carnival? _**I shook my head. **_Have you been in a closet your whole life?_**

My eyes widened. Then I realised, a beat too late, that she'd been joking. The grin slid off her face and she turned to Lucius. Her hands were flying but I caught the gist of what she was saying.

There was something wrong with me. I reacted strangely to things. I had a problem. I needed help. Then something about my aunt and uncle being investigated. Draco turned to me.

"Are you alright?" He asked me.

I nodded, wrapping my arms around myself. He hugged me, and I wrapped my arms around him. He looked into my eyes and gave me a worried smile.

"Are you afraid of my mom?" He asked me in hushed tones. I pulled my hands up in front of his face.

**_I'm..afraid to make her angry.._**I said. Draco tilted his head.

"And..what do you think would happen if you made her angry?" He asked.

I curled into myself defensively, biting my sweatshift cuff. I broke eye contact. He tilted my head up so I was looking at him.

"If they're hurting you, I need to know Harry." Draco said, an authoritative ring in his voice. I knew his parents were listening. I trembled. "Harry, please."

I looked up at him and, slowly, I nodded. He waited. I took a deep breath and started signing quickly.

**_They hit me, alright? And they don't let me eat..ever. I have to sneak it. My room is the broom closet under the stair case. They told me to just go ahead and kill myself..after they saw one time.. They tell me I'm not worth the water they shit in. And my uncle..when he has me alone..he... _**My hands dropped. Draco looked deep into my eyes.

"Harry..you have to tell me." He said. I didn't look up.

**_He does things to me..he touches me places I'd rather not be touched. _**I said. I wiped my hands on my pants as though I could expunge what had been done.

"Harry..did you ever bring that up to anyone?" He asked me. I shook my head. His mom came over.

**_What's wrong? _**She asked. I was breathing hard.

"I'll tell you tonight, alright?" Draco said. "Let's have fun for now..sound good Harry?"

I nodded, not looking up. I guess his mom agreed, because after a few moments Draco was pulling me toward the lights of the carnival. We walked around a bit, going on random rides. We went on one that spun you round and round till you were dizzy. That one made me laugh, and after that point the whole mood seemed to lighten considerably.

Draco pulled me over to one of the game tables and had me play. I lost, but he didn't tease me or anything. He handed me a ten and asked me to go get some popcorn. When I came back he was standing with his arms behind his back. I looked at him, confused, and he just smiled. When I got closer he leaned in and kissed me softly.

"Close your eyes." He whispered. I did as I was told. I felt him take the popcorn and put something squishy and soft in my arms. Oh. And it was _huge_. "Go ahead, you can look now."

I opened my eyes and looked at what I was holding. It was a teddy bear. A _panda_ teddy bear. I looked up at him, grinning. He was smiling back with a look in his eyes I'd seen a few times before.

"Come on." He said, taking my hand and bringing me toward the giant metal wheel.

The Ferris Wheel he called it. I was distractedly staring at him and apparently I was moving to slow for him, because he picked me up and carried me over to the line. I laughed again and his smiled widened. We got into one of the basket seats and I leaned against him. It stopped moving suddenly and I panicked for a moment, but Draco seemed at ease.

He leaned his head against mine and pointed off into the distance. I looked, leaning forward a bit. Something shot into the air like a rocket. I heard a low whistling and a sudden bang as it exploded. Fireworks. They went on like that for about 20 minutes, and I was leaning against Draco the whole time. He kissed me during the finally.

Once everything was calmed down the wheel started it's slow rotation again. As we reached the top again something cold hit the tip of my nose. I jumped slightly and Draco laughed at me while I crossed my eyes to see what it was. I saw something looking like a small white dot. I looked up at the sky and saw the snow falling on us.

I turned to him excitedly, but he looked worried. I tilted my head and he smiled softly, pulling me close and wrapping his arms around me.

**_What's wrong? _**I asked him. He smiled.

"You're just very small, I don't want you to get sick." He said. I smiled.

The ride stopped and he pulled me over to a little booth. He put in $3 and held me close. It took me a moment to realise we were having our picture taken. I laughed at myself, the smile breaking free on my face. It took 4 pictures and printed them out twice. He turned to me and handed me one.

"Come on. It's time to go home." Draco said. "It's past midnight."

I don't know how, but we managed to hold hands while balancing the rest of the stuff in our hands. Me with the massive bear and one set of photos, him with the popcorn that we'd slowly been eating our way through and the other set of photos. We met up with his parents at one of the limos. His mom looked considerably happier than she had the last time I'd seen her.

"We'll see you two at home, then." Lucius said, taking Narcissa back to the other limo.

Draco and I climbed into the one meant for us and resumed our cuddling position on the seat and I closed my eyes, dozing a bit. Draco must've thought I was asleep because he called his father and began to tell him what was going on at my aunt and uncle's house. I gripped his t-shirt a bit and he stroked my hair. When he got off the phone he kissed the top of my head.

"I won't let them hurt you any more.." He muttered against my hair. I was too far gone to tell him his promise was useless.


	13. Antidisestablishmentarianism

We spent a lot of the next day in Draco's room. He was trying to teach me how to say certain words. One's we both thought would be useful.

And one I just thought would be cool to say.

"Harry, that's a hard word." Draco said, looking amused when I'd written the word down. I went to sign and stopped. I said the word I'd learned two hours before.

"Please?" I looked up at him innocently. He sighed.

"You're gonna be the death of me, you know that?" He smiled softly, as though there were nothing else he'd rather happen.

"Please?" I said again. He nodded.

"We'll break it down, alright?" He said. "Start with 'an'."

"An." I said imeadiately. He smiled.

"Tie." He said. I opened my mouth, then realized I didn't know how to say the "t" sound. Smiling, Draco said it again slowly so I could watch his mouth.

"Tie." I said. He smirked a bit.

"Dis." He said.

"D-Dis." I said. He knew it was a lot of work for me.

"Try it all together, now." He said.

"Ant-tid-d-dis" I said. He smiled.

"You wanna take a break?" He asked. I shook my head. "Alright. Est."

"Est." I said eagerly.

"Ab." He said.

"Ab." I was watching his mouth carefully.

"Lish." He said. I waited a moment. He repeated himself.

"Lish." I said. He nodded.

"Try it all now." He said. I sighed.

"Ant-tidisest-tabl-l-lish" I stuttered out.

"Men." He said with a grin.

"M-m-m-m.." I huffed in frustration.

"M-e-n." He sounded it out very slowly.

"Men." I said, looking down.

"Tear." He said. I leaned my face close to his. He repeated himself twice.

"Tear." I said.

"All of it now." He said.

"Ant-t-t-tidisest-tablishm-m-mentar.." I said. He smiled. He thought the stutter was cute. I thought it got in the way.

"Ee." He said.

"Ee." I said.

"An." He said.

"An." I leaned in for the last part.

"Ism." He said. "Is. M."

"Isum." I said.

"Too much sound between the S and M." Draco said. His father coughed slightly.

"Draco?" He said. Draco looked up.

"Yeah, dad?" He asked.

"Why are you talking about S and M with Harry?" Lucius asked. Draco turned scarlet.

"I'm teaching him how to say a word!" Draco said.

"What word?" Lucius asked.

"Ant-t-t-tidisestablishm-m-m-ment-t-tarianism." I stuttered out. Lucius' eyes widened.

"Don't you think that's a bit advanced?" He asked Draco. Draco nodded.

"He said please though.." Draco murmured.

"Oh. Yes, I know what you mean. Your mother could get me to quit my job is she said please the right way." Lucius shook his head. Draco looked slightly disgusted.

"Um..is there a reason you're in here?" Draco asked. Lucius nodded, his lips pursing.

"The Dursley's have called. They'll be here in 2 hours to pick up Harry." He said. I closed my eyes and shut down entirely.

"Alright dad, thanks." Draco said, not sounding greatful at all.

"Draco..we'll fix this." Lucius said.

"I'd just go with him if it weren't for the surgery.." Draco said.

"Well..I can see about moving the date..if the Dursley's would be willing to take you. The ear drums will be good for transplant until January 3rd..so I'd say the best bet is to find out." Lucius said.

I heard the door open and close and I just didn't move. I could feel Draco's eyes on me. I was laying across his bed and breathing slowly. I felt a dull pounding in the back of my brain and something told me that if I didn't gt away from them and stopped being stressed out at the thought of them, I was probably going to die very young.

"Harry? Did you hear my dad? I can go with you." Draco said softly. I didn't bother to tell him it was a false hope. "Harry? It'll be okay..I'm telling you."

I looked up at him, deciding not to waste my time worrying about the innevitable. I pulled him down beside me and curled up against him. He smiled softly and kissed me.

"I love you, Panda." I said slowly. Clearly. He smiled even wider. We'd spent a lot of time on 'panda.'

"And I love you." He said back. He held me close until eventually we both fell asleep.

* * *

By the time we woke up we realised that my family was either already there, or would be ariving very soon. I looked at him, realizing I didn't have the words to convey exactly ehat needed to be said without using my hands.

"Draco." I said softly. He looked at me.

**_I have to leave everything here. Even my cloths. I have cloths there. They don't know about the laptop, but they would take it and give it to Dudley_** (I signed for 'fat' and 'child' to say Dudley.)**_ if they found out. Along with the pictures and the panda. They'd burn it all._**

He nodded slowly. He sat up and held me close, kissing me softly. There was a knock on the door.

"They're here." Lucius said into the room before stalking off down the hallway.

Draco looked at my cloths. I smiled.

**_They're acceptable. Don't worry. _**I took his hand and somehow I knew he understood that it was the end of the conversation.


	14. Kissing

I let go of his hand the second they came into view. He looked at me, surprised. I didn't look at him. I didn't feel anything. I walked to the bottom of the staircase and looked at the floor. Dudley was glaring at me. I could feel it.

"Are you ready to go?" Petunia asked in an alarmingly false happy voice.

"Actually, I was wondering if I could have a word?" Lucius asked, raising a brow at Vernon. "Just you and I?"

"Um..yes, of course." Vernon said moving to go with Lucius.

"Boys, why don't you take Dudley and make sure everything's all set for when Harry gets back?" Lucius said. Draco nodded and beconed for us to follow him.

Dudley stood near his mother.

"I'd rather not." He said.

"Suite yourself." Draco said. He started up the stairs and I followed him.

We made it barely to the landing before he turned to me and kissed me full on the mouth. I tensed up and he pulled away grinning.

**_What if they saw that? _**Harry asked.

"Oh well." Draco said, taking my hand and leading me down to a room beside his.

"Technically, this is your room." Draco said, opening the door. "I don't expect it'll get much use." He added when I raised a brow disbelievingly. "After all..my bed is big enough for six people. I think that, even if you didn't want to be right next to me, there would be room."

I grinned a bit. He pulled me over to the bed.

"Harry, I'm going to go with you." Draco said.

"No." I whispered. He leaned in close to me and kissed my lips softly.

"You don't understand, Harry. My dad has quite a few tricks up his sleeve." Draco said. I snuggled against him.

The door opened. A man in a black tux came in and smiled.

"Mr. Malfoy, your father says to pack your things." He said.

"I told you." Draco said, jumping up and tugging me along to his room.

He packed everything he wanted to bring quickly and efficiently..it all fit in one small travel bag. I was fidgetting. I didn't want him to go. Uncle Vernon was downright nast..even to some of Dudley's friends. God only knows what he'd do to Draco..He turned to me suddenly. I was just standing there, staring at my shoes. He walked over to where I was leaning against the door and put a hand against the door beside my head. I looked up at him and our lips collided almost immeadiately. This kiss was a bit more rough that what I was used to. His hand had moved behind my head so he could pull me closer. Somehow his tongue got in my mouth. He teased mine gently and I was lost in how wonderful it all was. My arms locked around his neck and he was pulling my body closer to his..

There was a knock at the door. He let go reluctantly and I pouted a bit but got out of the way of the door for fear that the person on the other side might grow impatient. Draco pulled the door open and let his father in. Lucius raised a brow at me and I blushed. My cloths were all wrinkled and twisted and my hair was an even bigger mess than usual. Draco didn't look much better.

"Well..I've arranged to keep the two of you until dinner, then I'll be bringing you over. Vernon said something about not expecting a guest and how he needed to clean up a bit." Lucius said. Draco nodded. "I'll leave you two alone now."

He winked at Draco on his way out. I felt a heavy blush staining my cheeks. Draco turned to me.

"Sorry about that.." Draco said, looking embarrassed. "I won't..I won't do it again."

I tilted my head, realizing what he was talking about. I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him softly. His eyes widened slightly and he kissed me back just as gently. I kissed him more roughly and he went right along with it. He pulled me over to the bed and we rolled onto it, him making sure his weight never fell full onto me.

He hovered over me and kissed me over and over. I was watching him carefully, trying to seal his lips to mine. He pressed himself against me and smiled.

"I do love you." Draco said. I smiled up at him.

"I l-love you t-too." I said. He smirked a bit.

"Enough to trust in me that you won't get hurt unless they go through me on this vacation?" Draco asked.

"I d-d-d-d-d" I struggled a bit under him. He got off of me and took my hands in his.

"Just sign, baby." He said, releasing my hands.

**_I don't want you to get hurt because of me, Panda! _**I signed anxiously. **_If they punish me just please stay out of it._**

"No." He said. He kissed me softly.

I started rocking a bit. He looked at me worriedly. I leaned against him. He held me until it was time for dinner, then he held my hand under the table through the meal. We went up to his room and got his stuff and then went out to the car. Narcissa smiled widely at us, hugging us each in turn, me more gently than him. I hugged her back timidly, smiling shyly up at her when she let go. She smiled even wider and kissed the top of my head. I leaned against Draco shyly. I wasn't used to adults treating me that way. Not since..my mom.


	15. The Dursleys

**_Draco's POV_**

By the time we pulled up to his aunt and uncles house he was chewing nervously on the cuff of his sweatshirt. We got out of the car and went into the house. He was hesitating, and I got the image in my head of a baby deer afraid to approach a new animal. He looked ready to run. I wrapped an arm around his shoulder and he pulled away. I felt my heart sink a bit as I realized I was about to see a new side to Harry. One he hadn't wanted me to see.

I opened the door and we walked into the house. Dudley came around the corner and glared.

"They're here." He said in a venomous tone. He really was disgusting to view.

"Hn." Vernon came into view. He was more disgusting than his son, somehow. "Take off your jackets. Hang them up and then get changed for bed."

Harry, who'd never stopped chewing his sweatshirt sleeve, looked very stressed at this request and slowly pulled off his sweatshirt. The scars were all healed by now, and I was greatful that there were no new ones. He hung up his sweatshirt beside mine and walked slowly toward what appeared to be a broom closet. He opened it and beconed for me to follow. I walked past his uncle and we squeezed into the small space. I heard the door slam behind us and I spun around. Harry grabbed my arm and I turned back to him.

**_We're locked in. _**He said.

He pulled off his cloths slowly and put on some PJ's. He sat down on what I realised must've been his bed. I sighed and changed, setting my cell phone on a shelf above the bed. He moved over a bit so I could sit on the small bed with him. He was looking at me with something shining in his eyes. I just wish I'd known what. He looked up at the vent and saw that it was closed. He pulled me so I was laying down and he lay on top of me. He was biting his lip.

"Harry? Are you alright?" I whispered. He nodded. I didn't believe him. "What's wrong, hon?"

He looked up at me with anxiety plain on his face. I wrapped my arms around him and pulled the dingy blanket over us. I kissed the tip of his nose and he looked ready to cry. He layed his head on my chest and sighed. He had a fistful of my shirt with his right hand. He was hesitating with his other hand in front of his face. He pressed the side of his finger against his lips and cuddled closer. It took me a few minutes to realise he had an oral fixation that only acted up during high anxiety moments. I traced my thumb along his lips and his eyelids fluttered, closing a bit. I continued what I was doing and watched him fall asleep in my arms. I grabbed my cell and texted my mom, asking her to pick up some pacifiers before she and my dad came over for dinner the following night. As long as I could get them in the room without them noticing I figured he would be ok.

She didn't ask why, but simply agreed to get them. I yawned and set the phone down. It was already bed time for me.

* * *

The next day we had to get up and make them breakfast. When we were done Vernon locked us in the bathroom and told us he and his family were going out. We were to take showers and, when he got back, go back to Harry's room. We waited until we heard the car leaving to try the door. It didn't budge.

"Harry..why don't you take a shower first?" He looked at me. "I won't look." I added, averting my eyes.

I saw his shirt fall to the floor and then his pants. He kissed my cheek and turned the water on. I continued to stare at the floor. He was hesitating to get in. I could see his shadow, one hand extended toward the curtain now immobile. I closed my eyes and waited. Then I felt his hands on mine. I looked up at him and saw him looking at me, waiting. I straightened off the wall and watched Harry's embarassed eyes. Finally he reached out and grabbed the hem of my shirt. It finally clicked in my head what he was doing. I took my shirt off, keeping my eyes on his. In a matter of moments we were both naked in a steam filled bathroom. He took my hand and pulled me into the shower, leaning against me when we'd gotten under the spray of the water.

Of all the things I'd been expecting while at his house, this definately wasn't one of them. He kissed my neck softly and I blushed. I was paranoid about what might happen. Worried that I might get horny. I didn't want to make him any more nervous than he already was. He reached over to the shampoo bottle and squirted some in his hands, rubbing them together and then reaching up to my head and washing my hair for me. He was smiling and I smiled back at him, feeling him pet my hair flat. I sud slid down my forehead and between my eyes. I crossed my eyes to look at it and he laughed. I laughed along with him, grabbing the shampoo and washing his hair while mine rinsed. We repeated the act with the conditioner and we both hesitated when it came for the body wash.

I finally put some in my hands and started washing his shoulders and back, massaging lightly as I went along. He relaxed against me as I finished his back and started rubbing along his chest. He sighed contently, leaning against me. He washed me slowly, kissing me occasionally. In the end we were both clean, and we were both content. We got out and dried off, dressing in our dirty cloths and curling up together in one corner of the bathroom. It wasn't long before he was asleep and I knew that he could probably sleep anywhere. What I could fathom was why he was sleeping so much.


	16. Calm Before The Storm

When his uncle got home he opened the bathroom door. Harry was awake by now and we walked out quickly. Vernon was looking at us with fury in his eyes.

"You. Go to Harry's room. Now." He said. I stood my ground. I hadn't expected him to grab me. He dragged me down the stairs with Harry chasing after us. He went into the kitchen and grabbed a knife, holding it to my throat. "I promise you boy, if you tell your parents anything less than wonderful things have happened here, it will be the end of your days."

I was trembling and Harry looked completely lost. I signed to him to run but he either couldn't, or _wouldn't_ go. I realised Vernon was waiting for an answer and I merely nodded. He locked me in Harry's room and I heard him stomping quite loudly down the hall to Harry. Then there was nothing.

* * *

Harry came back about an hour later, limping a bit. He sat on the bed with an emotionless stare.

"Harry?" I leaned toward him. He looked at me like he didn't recognize me. "What happened?"

He looked at his hands for a moment, as though expecting them to move on their own.

**_He made me clean Dudley's whole room. I hurt my back. _**He finally signed.

I made him lay down and I rubbed all the knots out of his back over the course of two hours. He was asleep 20 minutes into it. I lay down beside him, his head on my chest, and rested. My parents were due 3 hours from now. I'd been too afraid to tell them what was going on. They thought Harry and I were having an okay time. I drifted to sleep for a bit.

The door to the broom cupboard flew open. Vernon was standing there looking angry.

"Your parents are here. Get out right now. Before they come inside." He said.

I looked at Harry, who was already up, changed for dinner wearing a tight black t-shirt, blue jeans, and black arm warmers that looked like something he'd found at a thrift shop, and we walked out into the living room, ignoring Vernon's muttering of 'faggots' as we went. My parents came in moments later, Harry answering the door. My dad greeted him quickly, rushing to see Vernon. My mom hung back and talked to Harry.

**_How has it been? _**She asked. I couldn't see Harry's response, but she smiled so I guess he lied. That is, until her face went red and she signed rapidly. **_He did what?!_**

Harry signed quickly, flinching slightly. She hugged him and slipped something in his pocket. I got up and hugged her. I'd gotten my sweatshirt back and she slipped something into my pocket as well, kissing my cheek.

**_What were you and Harry talking about? _**I asked. She smiled sadly.

**_Vernon's threat on you. He'll be getting in a lot of legal trouble for that, I guarantee it. I had their house bugged while they were away. _**Her smile broadened and I just hugged her tightly. She pulled back and signed quickly. **_The police are going to be coming with us tomorrow to arrest him. We just have to wait, we need evidence of abuse on Harry too._**

I nodded and she walked with me into the kitchen where all the Dursley's sat and Harry was handing out plates of food with his eyes glued to anything but people's faces.

"take off those gloves boy. We're eating." Vernon said.

Harry pulled them off and tucked them into his pocket. He sat still for a while, staring at his plate as though it would try to eat him. Conversations carried on and as people finished their food Harry started picking up every one's plates. His was untouched, his silverware in the same position they'd been in when everyone sat down.

"Harry, where did you get those cuts?" My dad asked him as he picked up his plate.

He pulled his arm back quickly, but not quickly enough, because I saw the newly scabbed cuts lining his arm. I was horrified, and I began to question his story from earlier. He must've done that while I was asleep, but _why_? My dad looked at Vernon.

"Maybe it would be best if we took Harry home with us this evening." He said. My heart soared with hope.

"No." Was all Vernon said. My hopes were crushed immediately.

Harry started loading the dishwasher, not even looking at my father who was desperately trying to catch his eye. I kept my eyes on the table, silently slipping whatever my mom had put in my jacket pocket into my pants pocket. I heard my dad sigh.

"Well, we best be leaving. We'll see you two in a few days." He said, hugging me and then Harry.

I could've sworn he whispered something in Harry's ear. My mom kissed us both on the cheek and waved goodbye. As soon as their car pulled away Harry and I got thrown right back into the closet.

I looked at Harry with a tilted head. I decided not to question him about the cutting right away. He was too upset.

"What did my mom give you?" I asked after the three of them had thundered up the steps.

He reached into his pocket with a surprised look, as though he'd forgotten. He pulled out a maroon cell phone. I grinned and he shook his head, looking confused.

"It's a cell phone. Too call people when you need them. Like my dad or my mom. Or the cops." I explained.

He nodded. I reached into my pocket and pulled out what my mom had given me. It was the pacifiers I'd asked for. Harry looked at me, confused. I took one of them out of the package, it was a two pack, and kissed him softly. He blushed a bit and I ran my index finger down the center of his lips.

"Open your mouth, Harry." I said softly. He did as he was told. I popped the pacifier in. He twitched slightly and looked at me, not taking it out. "You can chew on that..since you don't have your sweatshirt."

He smiled around it and hugged me. He curled up on top of me as he had the night before and we settled down for bed. I ran my thumb up and down the bridge of his nose between his eyes, watching his eyes flutter as I had the night before. He sighed contently and fell asleep.


	17. Calamity

The next day Vernon left again, leaving us locked in Harry's room. He'd let us out for the bathroom and locked us right back in afterwards. I assumed he would be gone for a while so I turned to Harry. He was suckling on the pacifier with his bare arms wrapped around his knees. I touched one of the new lines and he looked up at me.

"Why did you do that to yourself? What didn't you tell me yesterday?" I asked.

**_..He hit me._** Harry's eyes dropped in shame.

I pulled him close and, after taking the pacifier out of his mouth, kissed him softly. He kissed back just as gently. We pulled apart and he lay next to me, trailing his fingers on my arm slowly. I rolled and hovered over him. I kissed him again. And again. And again. He was kissing back, over and over. My hand was on his side, but I wanted him closer to me. I lifted him off the bed with one arm, and his arms wrapped around my neck. I felt his fingers grip my hair, pulling me as tight as he could. After a little while of this I pulled away.

"You look so cute with your face all red like that." I said. The cupboard door flew open.

"You're disgusting." Vernon said, grabbing Harry by the hair and dragging him out. I moved to follow but the door was slammed in my face and locked. I pounded on it relentlessly but it didn't budge, and Vernon didn't let me out.

* * *

**_Harry's POV_**

He dragged me up the stairs and into his room. He through me on the bed. I knew what was coming. Again the same thought plagued my mind, something he'd said to me at a very young age. _It's not rape if you don't say 'no.'_

He grabbed my pants and wrenched them down. I was hyperventalating. He grinned wickedly. He grabbed for my boxers and I scooted away. I couldn't build up the courage to say it. I wanted to scream it. He pinned me to the bed and ripped off my underwear. I felt tears coming to my eyes. I knew what I'd done wrong. I made a friend.

He spread my legs, already yanking his pants down over the bulge in his pants. I was shaking my head, trying to pull away. He tried to kiss me. I pushed his face away. He pinned my arms and tried again. This time I turned my head. I felt something trying to pry into me and I screamed. He looked utterly shocked.

"NO!!!!!" I started thrashing. "NO!!! NO!!! NO!!!!!!!!!!!"

"SHUT UP!!" He punched me in the side of the head.

There was a pounding in my head, but it seemed much too loud. My glasses had broken, a shard going through my eyebrow. I screamed again. Then I heard a loud bang and I saw Lucius come running in and slam against him.

"You fucking pedophile!" He screamed. It was the last thing I heard before I passed out.

* * *

When I woke up I had a blanket over me and a cold feeling on the side of my face. I sat up and saw Lucius standing perfectly still over my uncle. I touched my forehead and gasped at the pain. Lucius looked at me and offered a week smile.

"It's okay, Harry. You're safe now." He said. I stared. "Draco's downstairs. Police and paramedics are on their way."

I trembled slightly. Draco was here still? Why? He couldn't see me like this. He'd be revolted. I started shaking so hard it looked like I was convulsing. Maybe I was. Lucius rushed over to me.

"Harry, calm down, you need to breath slowly." He said. When had I started hyperventalating again? When had I started crying? "Sh..Harry, I promise you, you are safe now."

He pulled me into his arms, wrapping me tightly in the blanket like a baby. He froze and looked down at me.

"Harry..you barely weigh anything." He said.

I couldn't answer him. He carried me down the stairs and over to where Draco sat on the couch. Draco was staring at me, heartbreak on his face. How could I have done this to him? I sobbed harder.

"Please tell me you know how to calm him down." Lucius said.

Draco nodded, holding his arms out. I was transfered like a child between two parents. Draco cradled me in his arms and I felt confusion along with everything else. Draco looked up at his dad suddenly.

"He's got glass in his face." He said.

"I know. We have to let the paramedics take care of it. We would only hurt him more." Lucius said. Why weren't any of them angry?

Draco looked at me and slowly started running his thumb over my quivering lips. After a minute or two of this I felt like I could breath again. I leaned the side of my face against his chest and he started playing with my hair. I was greatful that the glass had punctured the eyebrow that was father away from Draco, cuz it hurt. The front door opened as I was finally calming down and two cops ran in, paramedics close behind. The strapped me to a gourny and brought me out to an ambulence, Draco following close behind.

The paramedics started cleaning me up right away, realizing quickly that the only real damage was the glass that had stuck in my eyebrow.

"Damn, that's gotta be a shitty way to get your eyebrow peirced." One of them said.

Hearing it worded like that and gave me an idea. Maybe I could put a rod in the hole? Less questions would be asked that way. And it might look good.

"It's not even bleeding. The blood is coming from this scar here, on his forhead. It's like a lightening bolt.." He trailed off, looking at me. "Shit."

"What?" The first paramedic asked.

"It's Harry Potter." He said.

"How can you tell?" He asked.

"The cut isn't fresh. It's a scar that got torn open." The second paramedic said. "We gotta get going now."

"Why?" He asked.

"Dude, this kid's doctor hasn't seen him since he got this scar. He's been bitching about it. And he's really underweight. We gotta go." The second one said.

I felt a jolt and we started moving. Draco's hand was on mine, our fingers interlaced. I was trembling slightly. He looked at me, and I knew he saw the fear in my eyes.


	18. Peircing

My doctor was the same one I'd had all my life. Dr. Lupin. He shook his head when he saw me.

"Harry, what's happened to you?" He asked, looking at my face. "The scar ripped open?"

I nodded. He sighed and started stitching it up. I winced every time the needle peirced my skin. He smiled apologetically.

"So what's up with the glass? Paramedic said you peiced it." He said. I shook my head.

"U-u-unc-c-c-cle V-V-V-V-V-Vern-n-n-non h-h-h-hit m-me." I stuttered.

"You speak now?" He asked, wide eyed. I lowered my eyes. "Oh..you're just learning aren't you?"

I nodded.

"Well, go ahead and sign." He said. My hands flew up.

**_Uncle punched me in the side of the head and broke my glasses..but I was wondering if I could just put a ring in it and it could heal that way? _**I looked at him hopefully.

"Well, let me get the glass out first then we'll see about putting a rod in." He said. My face fell. "Odd's are we can though. I'll get a Surgical Steel rod to put into it, okay?"

I nodded. He left the room and I saw Draco staring nervously in at me. I waved at him and he grimaced. Dr. Lupin came back in a few minute's later and told me to lay back.

"Now this will hurt." He warned, holding the edge of the glass. I watched him. He smiled softly.

He ruffled my hair at the same time that he pulled the glass out. He was right. It did hurt. Enough to make me cry out. He cleaned it quickly, then looked at it closely. He smiled softly and put the rod in. It looked like a small belly button ring. It was black and red.

"I'm not supposed to do that. But I made an exception for you. You get enough questions, I can already see that." He said. "We keep a stock of Surgical Steel rings around for people who have allergic reactions to cheap metal but are too stubborn to let the hole close. I brought you in some cloths, so I want you to get dressed, and then I'll let Draco in. He's dying to see you."

I nodded. He turned around and I dressed quickly in the hospital sweats. I tapped his shoulder and he turned back to me. He smiled and turned to let Draco in.

Draco walked over to me slowly. I smiled softly at him.

**_I'm okay, Panda._** I signed. He ran over to me and hugged me close.

"I like that rod. It's kind of hot." He said. I just leaned against him. He stroked my hair for a few moments before I started crying again. "What's wrong?!"

He pulled away. I started wiping the tears away and he moved forward, wiping them away for me.

**_I'm sorry. _**I said. **_I tried to get him off but he wouldn't let go. I'm sorry I did this to you._**

"Harry you didn't do anything wrong! This was all his fault!" He insisted. I looked at him and sobbed again.

**_I'm sorry you have such a stupid boyfriend. _**I said. He sighed.

"You're not stupid Harry. You're wonderful." He said. He got up on the bed with me and pulled me close. I breathed deeply, a crying breath, and cuddled close. "Does it hurt?"

I nodded. "A-a l-l-little.."

"Are you ready to go home?" He asked. I looked up at him. I knew he meant his house.

**_Maybe..if I get one of those sucky things again. _**I grinned. He pulled one out of his pocket and held it to my mouth. I bit down on it and sucked a bit. Lucius walked in.

"Harry, you'll be staying with us until we can find you a suitable home to go into." He said softly. I looked up at Draco.

"Dad..why can't he just live with us?" Draco asked.

"It's illeagal for me to take custody of him longer than necessary when you two are dating." He said. "But come on. He's just been released to us. We have dinner with your uncle tomorrow night, and you two need to be in working order by then."

Draco nodded and stood in front of me. He took my hands and pulled them around his neck. I held onto him and he lefted my legs around his waist so he was carrying me on his back. Lucius laughed quietly before walking out, leading the way for Draco and I. I had my head tucked into his neck and I was breathing in his scent. It was comforting. Relaxing. He set me down when we reached the limo. His mom was inside, his dad waiting for us to get in.

I climbed up next to him on the seat, trying to stay awake. I was exhausted. It was 3 AM by this point. I noticed with mild amusement that time seemed to fly with Draco. He pulled me into his lap at some point, and I was too tired to object. I nuzzled against him and fell asleep. I didn't even wake up when we got to his house.


	19. Nightmares

I was worried what people would say about my new ring after Christmas break. But for now I had to deal with Christmas itself. Draco and I were stuck with each other. Always. Lucius couldn't pry us apart for anything. It was Christmas eve when I started back tracking on what I had gotten Draco. It was too late to get anything else, but I was edgy the whole day.

"What's wrong babe?" He asked. We were in his hot tub together. I looked up at him. He smiled softly and pulled me over to him. "You can tell me."

"Y-y-y-y-you w-w-won't l-l-l-l-like y-your p-p-pr-pres-sant." I said softly. His eyes widened.

"Harry, I didn't expect you to get me anything at all." Draco said. "Anything you give me I will love. Because it's from you."

I smiled a bit and cuddled against him. He started rubbing my back and I sighed softly, laying my face against his neck. He kissed the top of my head and I looked up at him. I leaned against him and pressed my lips to his. He kissed back. My eyes slid shut. I wondered if this was what I had to look forward to the rest of my life. I smiled at the idea. At Draco being all mine. Forever.

"Enjoying yourself?" He asked. I blushed and nodded. "Come on. It's time for bed."

He took my hand and pulled me up the back steps into the house. I looked at the cold, snowless ground around us and wished it would be white when I woke up. He pulled me into his room and we changed and got into his bed.

Draco's surgery was scheduled for the day after Christmas. At the same time he was going under the knife I was getting my stitches out and the first check-up I'd had in 12 years. I was nervous. I snuggled against Draco and breathed him in. That was the last memory I have of Christmas eve that year. I was so tired I fell asleep immediately.

It was Draco who woke me up the next morning. At least I thought it was morning. I was drenched in sweat and he was hovering over me looking worried.

"Harry, are you awake?" He asked. I nodded, breathing hard. I'd been having a nightmare about my uncle. "Come on, you need to get changed."

I tilted my head and he sighed.

"Harry..you wet the bed." He said. I blinked and slowly looked down at myself. He was right. "Come on. We gotta take a shower and get in your bed, alright? It's only 2 AM."

I got up slowly, keeping my eyes on the floor. He waited by the door to the bathroom connected to his room. I went straight in. He turned the water on and I started stripping to get in. He walked out of the bathroom and came back with 2 sets of Pajama's and boxers. I could feel him watching me as I climbed in. I wasn't sure if he was planning on getting in or not. I started washing myself. I heard the curtains flicker and I felt him behind me, though we weren't touching. I felt awkward for some reason. Maybe it was because he'd been contaminated with my urine. I stared anywhere but at his face.

"Harry, it's ok." He said, hugging me from behind.

I was suddenly extremely concious of the fact that we were both _very_ naked. I felt a blush creeping up my neck. He kissed the heated flesh. I was almost afraid to turn around. I didn't understand what was happening to my body.

* * *

A/N: Sorry guys. I know it's a short chapter but I don't have the will power to write a sex scene or whatever this would've turned out to be. Maybe tomorrow.

As for Harry, I know that he's acting weird considering all the stuff he's been through. Like he's _too_ normal. He's learned how to block all the crap out. I know I _should_ make him go through the "Oh shit angry adult" phase much longer than I did but I don't have the patients for proper Character Developement right now. But he IS going to become rather attatched to Lucius after all that. Just cuz it fits. Lucius was the only adult _helping_ him.


	20. Christmas

**_I was suddenly extremely concious of the fact that we were both _very_ naked. I felt a blush creeping up my neck. He kissed the heated flesh. I was almost afraid to turn around. I didn't understand what was happening to my body._**

* * *

I trembled slightly and Draco paused.

"Harry are you okay?" He asked. I swallowed and nodded. "You sure?"

I looked at his arms, still wrapped around me. I wrapped my arms around his and leaned my back against his chest. I sighed and signed up at him.

**_I feel weird.. _**He laughed softly.

I looked up at him and saw him looking over my body. The always limp limb between my legs was slowly stretching itself out.

"Harry, it's called being horny." He said softly. I blushed deeply. "I can help..if you want."

I stared at him for a moment, and then, slowly, I nodded. He backed me against the wall and started kissing me. The water was pouring over us even where we stood. He started kissing down my body and I was confused. This wasn't helpful. He was making it stand up!

He got down on his knees and kissed it. It was weird seeing him like that. It reminded me of a similar situation I'd been in. Under less pleasant circumstances. Suddely he put his whole mouth around it. I didn't remember ever feeling that good before. I didn't know what to say. I don't think I would've had the ability if I'd wanted to say anything. And not just because of the stutter. There were sounds coming out of me now. I bucked into his mouth and he laughed softly, the vibrations making it feel even better.

He held my hips against the wall and continued what he was doing. I shuddered, my head back against the wall of the shower. It felt like something was going to explode it felt so good. There was a steady hot pool forming in my stomach. The more Draco sucked the bigger it got, then suddenly it overflowed. I almost fell over. It felt amazing. A hostile pleasure was pulsing through me. I was trembling as Draco's arms found their way around my body. He kissed me softly.

"Well, I think it's time for bed." He sid softly. I nodded tiredly.

* * *

Draco shook me softly the next morning. I looked up at him tiredly.

"Happy Christmas." He said softly, kissing my lips. I blinked tiredly. I hadn't been told that in years. I sat up and smiled at him.

"Happy Christmas." I said. He pulled me off the bed and toward the door.

"Mom's waiting for us. Come on." We walked down to the living room where a huge tree stood with towering piles of gifts beneath it.

What do you get someone that has everything? I felt like I'd failed him. I slipped my gift into his hand and looked away. I'd taken the chain off and turned it into a book mark, just in case he didn't want to be seen wearing it. His parents weren't in the room yet.

"Harry?" He looked at me.

"Open it." I said softly. He smiled and opened it.

"Woah..Harry.." He looked up at me. "It's..I love it."

He kissed me slowly, sliding a small box into my hand. He then set it down gently. I stared at the box a moment.

"Open it." He said softly. I opened it slowly, nervously.

I look at what was within the box. It was a blue and green yin yang pendant on a leather string. The same one I'd been staring at on that shopping trip weeks ago. I looked up at him with wide eyes. It was a split pendant. Two halves of a whole. I hadn't noticed before. I put the blue one around my neck, and motioned for him to come closer. I reached my hands up around his neck and kissed him, tying the green half around his neck. He smiled into the kiss.

"Thank you." Draco said.

**Don't thank me..I should be thanking you. You made me whole again. **I looked at him seriously.

He smiled softly. I heard his parents walking in. Lucius came up behind me and hugged us both. I turned a bit and hugged him back, greatful that I had at least one adult cared.

"Come on, sit down, boys. There's gifts to go around." Lucius said, sitting down and picking up a small package. "Here you are, Draco."

Draco took it and opened it. It was a key. He looked at his dad, confused.

"I'm teaching you to drive." Lucius said, shrugging.

"Really?!" He looked excited.

Lucius smiled and picked up another package, handing it to his wife. It was a beautiful necklace. He picked up another one and reached toward Draco. Draco leaned back and he put the box in front of me. I looked at him confused and took it. He smiled encouragingly and I opened it. There was a sweatshirt in the box. It was my favorite band. How did they even know I liked Green Day?

"Thank you!" I gasped in a small voice. Draco laughed softly.

"Did you think you weren't getting anything?" Draco asked.

"I haven't goten anything in years.." I said, blushing.

And so it went on. I got some cloths that fit me, and CD's, an iPod, things I'd never imagined having. Then came a gift from Narcissa. The last one. It was a small collection of photo's in single frames. Photo's of my parents. Me as a small child. I cried. They told me to go relax before dinner.

Draco came with me and we slept and admired what we'd recieved until Dobby, the butler, came to get us. By this point we were in the hot tub. I'd gotten my wish, it was snowing. The steam from the hottub melted the flakes before they reached us. It was beautiful.

"Draco, your mother wants me to tell you your uncle is here." Dobby said.

"Uncle Sev?" Draco asked.

"No, he'll be ariving later. Sirius is here." Dobby said.

"Sirius Black?" I asked, my eyes wide. That was my godfather's name..but they couldn't be the same, right?

"Yeah. Why?" Draco asked. I just shrugged, getting out and going to Draco's room to get dressed. I pulled on some of the jeans that fit me and a plain black t-shirt. Draco was wearing basically the same thing, except that his shirt was green. I pulled on the Green Day sweatshirt and He pulled on a plain blue one. He kissed my cheek and, holding my hand, guided me down to the dining room.


	21. Sirius

"Yes, Draco's been dating around actually, found a guy perfect for him. Ah, here they are." Lucius was saying.

"Come on, Harry." Draco said, grinning. Sirius's head snapped up toward us.

"H-Harry?" Sirius was staring at me, his hand still entwined with a gray haired man.

I half hid behind Draco, who looked confused.

"You two know each other?" He asked. Surius nodded.

"I'm..his godfather." Sirius said.

"Oh." Draco's eyes widened, turning to look at me. "Is that why you got ready so fast?"

I nodded and peeked at Sirius. He walked toward me slowly and Draco stepped out of the way. He ran his hand down my face, looking at me closely. My anxiety skyrocketed and I looked around for Draco, but he'd gone to find his mom. I did, however, see Lucius. I cast him a nervous glance and ran over to him, hiding behind him. He twisted a bit and looked at me worriedly.

"Harry, he's not gonna hurt you. He's not like Vernon." He said, his voice understanding. I didn't care. I barely remembered Sirius, how did I know anything about him? "Come on, let's go eat, you can talk with him later."

I sat stiffly through dinner and barely touched my food. Draco was rubbing my leg under the table, letting me know he was there. Sirius was a friend of my parents, so why didn't he take custody of me? What was the point? I stared at my lap most of dinner. When everyone was finished Lucius and Sirius went into the sitting room and talked for a little while, then they pulled me into the room. It felt like everything was happening too fast. I sat in the arm chair curled up.

"Harry, come here." Lucius said.

I gripped the chair for a moment, then did as I was told. He stood up and walked over to Sirius with me. He took one of my hands and put it out to Sirius. Sirius took it and just held it for a moment.

"Harry, come on. I'm not gonna hurt you. Don't be scared." He said.

I felt Lucius rubbing my back and I tensed my already rigid body. I closed my eyes and thought about what was going on. If Sirius was Draco's uncle..and my godfather..did that make us incestual? I mentally slapped myself. No. It didn't. It meant Sirius was my godfather as well as Draco's uncle. There was no blood relation. I let out a slow, shaky breath.

"Harry?" I opened my eyes and looked at Sirius. "Come on.."

I pulled my hand away from his and started signing slowly. **_Where..have you been?_**

"Fighting, Harry. Fighting the whole world." He said. "They wouldn't let me take you because I was a single gay male."

**_So what?! Where were you?! Why didn't you come see me?! Why didn't you make someone take me out of there?! _**I could feel my mouth trying to form words, but the ones I needed, I hadn't learned yet.

"Harry, calm down." Lucius said, wrapping an arm around my shoulders and turning me so I was looking at him. "He didn't know what was going on, and your aunt and uncle convinced the courts that he would corrupt you. He wasn't allowed to see you."

I could feel myself trembling. **_But..he...there's nothing wrong with being gay!_** I could hear Sirius laughing.

"Exactly, Harry." I looked at Sirius. Lucius took my hand and brought it to Surius's face. I tried to pull away, but Lucius was stronger than me.

"Harry, I'm telling you, he won't hurt you. He's not like Vernon." I saw Sirius's nose wrinkle a bit at the mention of my uncle. I stopped resisting, but I was still shaking.

Sirius moved his hand to rest on mine. I didn't pull away. I just waited. Slowly he stood up. I took a quick step back, pulling my hand away again. He reached out to me and ran his hand on my hair. I inclined my head a bit toward him. I loved people playing with my hair. He pulled me into his arms and hugged me. I tensed instantly and then, as I felt him pulling away, I hugged him back. I heard him gasp and hug me back to himself.

"See? It's okay, Harry." He said.

"O-ok.." I said. He pulled back and looked at me in surprise.

"You can talk?" He asked. I crossed my arms.

"N-n-no." I said, trying to talk even though I was limited.

"Then why are you saying things?" He asked, raising a brow.

"I'm teaching him." Draco's voice entered the conversation. I spun to look at him. He smiled at me and I went over to him.

"He really trusts you, doesn't he?" Sirius asked.

"Yeah, it took a few months, but he does." Draco said, wrapping his arms around me.

"I see." He said. I pressed my face into Draco's shoulder and inhaled. He laughed softly and ran his thumb gently on my lower back.

"Don't worry. He's just going through a lot." Draco said. "Everything he's used to is changing."

I felt like a kid. I looked at Draco and glared. He smiled at me.

"Come on, time for bed." Draco said, pulling me out of the room and up the stairs. By now we were laughing as we got into his room. Why, I wasn't sure. Maybe the release of tension was more exhilerating than I thought.

I jumped onto my bed before he sat down and smiled at him. He moved onto the bed with me and I just looked at him fo a few minutes. Then I kissed him. I was expelling all the emotions from my body as I did so, except for the love which seemed to be growing every day. I wondered if his was, too. He kissed me back, just as gently as me.

"Come on, babe. Time to sleep." He said. I rolled my eyes.

"Okay, panda.." I said, kicking of my shoes and pants.


	22. Screams

**_A/N: So if anyone follows my profile at all you'll know that people keep dying in my life and I withdrew from writing. Well, that was until a little inspiration bug bit me on the ass about 2 weeks ago. I've gone through like 3 notebooks writing new FF's and Original's since then. And since I'm getting too friendly with my insomnia I decided to update a neglected story. So..Enjoy. :)_**

* * *

Lucius shook me softly. I opened my eyes slowly and looked up at him. He pressed a finger to his lips and motioned to Draco, who was still sleeping beside me. I looked over at him and saw his eyes were wide open. There was blood trickling from his mouth and a slash in his throat. I screamed as loud as I could, but there wasn't a single sound coming from me. I cried and looked back at Lucius, who was gone, and my uncle stood in his place, smiling, a knife in his hand. Suddenly I jolted. Draco and Lucius were standing over me and I was gasping for breath. I trembled, staring at Lucius, then looking back toward Draco and slowly it clicked in my head. I'd been dreaming. It was just a dream. I let out a shuddering breath and attatched myself to Draco. He rubbed my back slowly. Why the hell did I have to get so attatched to him so quickly?

"Harry..what happened?" Draco asked. I took a few deep breaths.

"He k-killed you.." I said. He blinked a few times and looked at me, confused.

"No one's gonna hurt me. No one's gonna hurt you. We're ok now." He said. I blinked and tears slid down my cheeks as I nodded. "Come on, go back to sleep."

He rubbed my back gently as I buried my face into the pillow, curled up tight to his side.

* * *

When we got up the next morning we had to dress quickly. Draco made me eat, even though he couldn't. We got into a small car and drove to the hospitol. Lucius took Draco down to the surgical ward and Narcissa stayed with me. I wanted to cry at the look on her face. I raised my hands.

_**Go be with him.**_

**_You _need me here.**

_**I don't. I can do this on my own. **_I shooed her away and she went to her son.

I went into the clinic area and Dr. Lupin was there in almost no time at all. He did the most thorough physical ever. At least that's what I would assume. I've never been poked and prodded and stuck with so many needles in my life. I was crying halfway through the shots that I apparently _had _to have. I could tell he felt guilty, but it wasn't all him that was upsetting me. By the end of it he told me I needed to gain weight and the usual crap. He surprised me though, when he said I needed to see an eye doctor, and a psychiatrist. I didn't want to fight him on it. It was too exhausting trying to make all the words fit in my mouth, my hands were easier to use, but my arms hurt.

"It'll be alright, Harry." Dr. Lupin said. I sniffled and wiped at my eyes. "Sirius Black is supposed to be picking you up."

I stared at the floor for a while, feeling like I was going to have a meltdown. I was getting so pissed at Draco for making me give a shit about him. I wanted to not care if he came out of this deaf and I didn't want needles shoved into my arms over and over and god _damnit _I didn't want to be picked up by Sirius black. None of this was an improvement, it was worse than ever, because now I didn't know _anything _about my own life. I couldn't even control my emotions anymore. Dr. Lupin walked me out to the waiting area where my godfather sat waiting.

"Hey, how'd you do?" He asked like I was taking a test. Maybe I was. Dr. Lupin handed him a file.

"Make sure Lucius gets this." Dr. Lupin said.

Sirius reached out slowly toward me and I jolted my body away from him instinctively. I was pissed at _him_ too. He pulled his hand back looking rejected and I stared at the floor.

"Come on..we're going back to the Malfoy's until Draco gets out of surgery." He said.

I looked up at him immediately. Draco wasn't out yet? How long did a surgery like that take? Had something gone wrong? And why the _hell _did I pick today to be edgy and angry and question everything? I wrapped my arms around myself and silently tucked up under Sirius' arm. He didn't question it, just led me out to his car. When we finally arrived back at the house I moved to go up to Draco's room, but he put a hand on my shoulder.

"Let's go outside, ok?" He said. I nodded and followed him out the back door. "I can see that you're very angry."

I nodded. He ruffled my hair slightly, as if it needed to be messier.

"You ever tried letting your anger go?" He asked. I stared at him in confusion. "Like..hitting a pillow, getting in a fight, screaming, stuff like that?"

I nodded. He stood up and turned away from me. He was standing so still and so silently that I nearly pissed myself when he let out a sudden, loud yell. I flinched away from him, but when he turned back to me his face was calm, he looked almost happy.

"Go ahead. Scream. It'll work. I can tell. You were screaming in your sleep last night." He said. I stood beside him, embarassed, awkward, and blushing. He smiled at me. "Think about the thing that's upsetting you the most. Then just let it go."

I thought he was crazy, but I was desperate for approval after the visit to the Dr.'s office, so I let my mind wander and I felt tears well up in my eyes again. He watched me for a little while then placed his thumb on my chin.

"Now open your mouth and scream." He said. And I did. I amazed myself and stumbled backwards. When I finished I felt like a huge gust of wind had swept through me and stolen my breath. He smiled softly. "Feel any better?"

"Yeah." I nodded. He laughed.

"Tired?" He asked. I nodded sheepishly. "Go ahead inside and take a nap. I'll wake you up when it's time to go see Draco."

I nodded and went inside. I curled up on the couch and cuddled under my sweatshirt. I don't remember having a dream.


	23. Singing

The wake up call didn't bother me as much as what it represented. I jumped up almost instantly and stumbled because my foot was asleep. Sirius caught me and wrapped my sweatshirt around my shoulders.

"You've only been asleep for 2 hours." He said. I nodded and went out to the car with him. I became self conscious on the way there. Did I look like a wreck? Did my breath smell?

"Harry, calm down."

I looked up at Sirius and saw him looking entirely relaxed. Was that good? Could Draco hear? I felt my heart speed up as we pulled into the parking lot. Sirius parked and brought me into the hospital. When I saw Lucius I ran over to him and he hugged me. He looked worried. I felt my heart plummet.

"We haven't checked his hearing yet. We've been waiting for you." Lucius said. I bit my lip and nodded. He kept and arm around my shoulder, unintentionally putting pressure on my sore upper arms, and before we walked in he looked at me. "One at a time. Ok? Just say what you can, see if he can hear you."

I nodded and walked into the room alone. I still felt like I was half asleep as I walked over to the bed. He looked up at me, waiting. I opened and closed my mouth a few times, practicing silently as I was terrified of my voice at the moment. I looked up at him and he looked panic stricken. I bit my lip and moved closer.

"Draco..can you hear me?" I asked. His mouth dropped open.

"Yeah. Yeah, I can." Draco said grinning. I smiled widely and my heart pounded in my chest. "Come here. Please."

I moved over to him slowly and sat on the edge of his bed. He pulled me into a hug and I squeaked, half from the pain, half from surprise. He let me go, but kept his hands on my upper arms, squeezing excitedly. I'd seen other people do this, when they really wanted to get a look at someone. It wasn't an uncommon gesture, but I'm quite sure it wasn't supposed to hurt this bad. He must have realized, because he let go quickly and asked what was wrong. I was afraid to shrug, or use sign, because my arms had been abused enough for one day, but my mouth didn't fit the words as they once had, so many years ago. He watched me with concern in his eyes and I found myself wondering why.

I was falling back into my shell, the one I had let fall only for him. What was wrong with me? I contemplated this for a few moments before realization dawned. Something that sickened me almost instantly. I must have known subconsciously what it would mean if his hearing was fixed. Exactly what I'd known all along. My biggest fear, though I wasn't sure how I'd let it get so far in that it had become a fear at all. Draco was normal now. No more handicapped wing at Hogwarts. No more leverage to keep him from bullying people. Nothing he had in common with me anymore. My voice would mean nothing to him now. And thus I would mean nothing. I was defective, and he was perfect, the way it was meant to be. We would break up now. Even if he didn't see it just yet.

"Harry, don't do this." He whispered suddenly. I looked at him. "What's gotten into you? Why don't you want to talk to me?"

I stared at him silently, my face blank and probably a bit cold now as well. He looked scared, but that was the last thing I wanted him to be. I knew he was in too far already, but I decided to let him stay in where he was, just a little longer until he could realize what he wanted wasn't really me at all, so I kissed him gently on the cheek and left. Sirius was gentle when I came out and tears were starting to form in my eyes. Narcissa saw this and drew a sharp breath.

"Did it work? Can he hear?" Sirius asked.

I nodded before burying myself into him, reminding myself that he was a good person. Not like the others. All my old self-inflicted limitations were creeping back into play, and I had to fight everything in me just to manage this simple anxiety-inducing touch, but this was still better than my emotionless form of 5 months before.

"Is he alright?" Lucius asked. I went to nod, but stopped short at Sirius' answer.

"He was sleeping before we came here. And he got a lot of shots today, so his arms are probably pretty sore." Sirius said. "He should be fine tomorrow."

"You should probably get him home." I heard Lucius say. I felt Sirius' arms twine around me.

"Will do," He said.

He led me out to the car and I climbed in silently. Why were they worried about me? I couldn't wrap my head around it. I stared out the window the whole ride home, not realizing until too late that we were no where near the Malfoy Manner. I caught Sirius peeking from the corner of his eye as he parked the car in front of what looked to be a 2 story condo, maybe waiting for my reaction. I offered none.

"Ok, now I know something's wrong." He finally said. "You don't even care that you don't know where you are?"

I shook my head, tears finally, _finally_, sliding down my cheeks. Sirius got out of the car and came around to my side. He opened the door and crouched down in front of me, wiping at my tears almost as quickly as they fell. He was silent as he unbuckled me and gathered me into his arms. He was warm and soft, which was much more comforting than it ever could have been to hug someone I was actually related to. Well, other than my parents.

Suddenly I realized we weren't outside anymore. He had carried me into the house that must be his, and was currently sitting beside me on the couch where he had placed me. I curled against his side, my legs tucked up and my arms tight around my torso.

The thing that surprised me most, after I'd finally fallen into a half-asleep haze, was that he never once tried to make me tell him what was wrong. And it surprised me even more that I was grateful. He turned on the TV at some point, and some show about singing was on. Some girl was butchering one of my favorite Paramore songs, and I hummed it softly, the _right _way, under my breath. Sirius looked down at me.

"Harry," he said. I waited for the questions I knew he wanted to ask, but he surprised me again. "Do you know how to sing?"

* * *

A/N: OFFICIALLY my first beta'd chapter EVER :D Thank you Lilith G. Astroll!


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